Isn’t it a threat to reject unfair offers in the Ultimatum Game?

TLDR: title.

In the Ultimatum Game, there are $10 to be divided between two players. First, Player 1 proposes a split, such as “I get $8 and you get $2” or “we both get $5″. Then, Player 2 either accepts this proposal or rejects it. If they reject it, both players get nothing.

Standard theory around here is that you should reject offers where you’d get less than $5. It’s a little counterintuitive at first, because if you’re offered $2, you might think “why not just take it? The alternative is to get nothing.” But the standard reason to reject it is that, if you make a consistent (or predictable-in-advance) policy of rejecting unfair offers, then people won’t make you unfair offers, because they know they’ll get nothing if they do.

This feels an awful lot like a threat to me, now that I think about it… and standard theory around here is also that nobody should make or give in to threats. The reason being: if you give in to threats, all you’re doing is showing people that threatening you is a good idea, and that might entice them into making threats when they wouldn’t otherwise have done that.

Think of a manipulative partner saying “if you don’t do these dishes right now, I’ll break up with you” — I think people say this when they know they’re talking to a spineless loser who’ll get up and go miserably do the dishes, and not when they know they’re talking to a well-spined person who will say “what? fuck you”. Because if they’re talking to someone who won’t give in, then they have to go ahead and break up with you over one load of dishes, and that’s not actually in their interests. So, goes standard theory, be the person who won’t be influenced by that nonsense, and the nonsense won’t come.

But wait a second. Suppose you’re playing the ultimatum game with someone, and you’re Player 1. Obviously, your own favorite outcome is to get all $10 for yourself, but that leaves the other person with $0 which makes them indifferent between accepting and rejecting. So maybe instead, you plan to offer them $1 while keeping $9 for yourself. That way, it’s in their own interests to accept the offer.

You’re not trying to hurt them; you’re trying to have more money.

But they look across the table at you, and say “if you offer me less than $5, I’ll make sure we both get nothing”.

Why is that not a threat? Why should you give in and change your plan away from what would otherwise be your default, in the absence of their self-harming commitment that they only made because they think it’ll work on you? Why should you do what they demand, when, as is the defining characteristic of a threat, it’s only good for them if you give in?