Several Internet people have reported that if someone doesn’t tell you “My family is horribly fucked up and I spent most of my childhood in excruciating suffering of some kind, and if I tried to tell my parents about it they called me mean names” it means you don’t know them well enough yet. I have no idea how to fix that, but it seems worth keeping in mind, and perhaps increasing the weight of “my kid is sincerely hurt by things I consider trivial” relative to “my kid is a selfish whiny attention whore with no sense of proportion”, even if the latter turns out to be true of kids in general.
Interesting—I can’t relate to that that much, but I notice people report different experiences and have different assumptions about parents, I wonder which is more common … I guess this calls for a poll!
So how much do you think this describes your childhood?
My family is horribly fucked up [pollid:198]
I spent most of my childhood in excruciating suffering of some kind [pollid:199]
f I tried to tell my parents about it they called me mean names [pollid:200]
The “My family is horribly fucked up” is kinda fuzzy. I consider “fairly fucked up” to be the norm. So if my family is about average, should I vote close to Yes (because they’re not horribly fucked up, but sorta) or should I vote No (because they are the norm)?
By the way, there is no contradiction—even the selfish whiny attention whores with no sense of proportion can be sincerely hurt by things you consider trivial.
Several Internet people have reported that if someone doesn’t tell you “My family is horribly fucked up and I spent most of my childhood in excruciating suffering of some kind, and if I tried to tell my parents about it they called me mean names” it means you don’t know them well enough yet.
It would seem that nobody knows me. People who by this standard are, in fact, known or have the possibility of being known without making up lies have my sympathy.
Several Internet people have reported that if someone doesn’t tell you “My family is horribly fucked up and I spent most of my childhood in excruciating suffering of some kind, and if I tried to tell my parents about it they called me mean names” it means you don’t know them well enough yet. I have no idea how to fix that, but it seems worth keeping in mind, and perhaps increasing the weight of “my kid is sincerely hurt by things I consider trivial” relative to “my kid is a selfish whiny attention whore with no sense of proportion”, even if the latter turns out to be true of kids in general.
Interesting—I can’t relate to that that much, but I notice people report different experiences and have different assumptions about parents, I wonder which is more common … I guess this calls for a poll!
So how much do you think this describes your childhood?
My family is horribly fucked up [pollid:198]
I spent most of my childhood in excruciating suffering of some kind [pollid:199]
f I tried to tell my parents about it they called me mean names [pollid:200]
(I agree with your conclusion, by the way!)
Wow, that is a lot of “Yes” responses.
I am in shock at the “yes” responses to the third question. Relevant
The “My family is horribly fucked up” is kinda fuzzy. I consider “fairly fucked up” to be the norm. So if my family is about average, should I vote close to Yes (because they’re not horribly fucked up, but sorta) or should I vote No (because they are the norm)?
By the way, there is no contradiction—even the selfish whiny attention whores with no sense of proportion can be sincerely hurt by things you consider trivial.
In fact, that’s perhaps causal. They’re sincerely hurt because they have no sense of proportion (and not likely to gain it).
It would seem that nobody knows me. People who by this standard are, in fact, known or have the possibility of being known without making up lies have my sympathy.