Are you exclusively interested in flirtatious banter as a mechanism for initiating casual sex? Or are you interested in other purposes of banter, like finding a marriage partner?
The post is focused on (banter → sex) mainly because that’s the place where I most strongly feel I’m missing something, i.e. I am unable to picture how it would plausibly work. Banter as a general social skill, e.g. for making friends or just having fun conversations or breaking the ice with new people, is something I’m already quite comfortable with.
Indeed, much of the reason I was originally confused about the (banter → sex) pipeline was because I have had so much of that kind of conversation for so many years, and over all that time it did not particularly seem to lead to sex.
It might be worth tracking the hypothesis that people aren’t thinking quite as specifically as you seem to be about banter as a lever to pull to get sex. I for example saw banter and sex as part of a way to explore a potential long term relationship and marriage. Sometimes casual sex would happen instead, and it could sometimes be interesting to explore banter and casual sex for their own sake. But I never really was interested in finding the most efficient ways to get sex from the largest number of casual partners, the pickup artist culture.
Are you exclusively interested in flirtatious banter as a mechanism for initiating casual sex? Or are you interested in other purposes of banter, like finding a marriage partner?
The post is focused on (banter → sex) mainly because that’s the place where I most strongly feel I’m missing something, i.e. I am unable to picture how it would plausibly work. Banter as a general social skill, e.g. for making friends or just having fun conversations or breaking the ice with new people, is something I’m already quite comfortable with.
Indeed, much of the reason I was originally confused about the (banter → sex) pipeline was because I have had so much of that kind of conversation for so many years, and over all that time it did not particularly seem to lead to sex.
It might be worth tracking the hypothesis that people aren’t thinking quite as specifically as you seem to be about banter as a lever to pull to get sex. I for example saw banter and sex as part of a way to explore a potential long term relationship and marriage. Sometimes casual sex would happen instead, and it could sometimes be interesting to explore banter and casual sex for their own sake. But I never really was interested in finding the most efficient ways to get sex from the largest number of casual partners, the pickup artist culture.