A frame is a colloquial term for “what someone sees as important, what sort of questions they ask or what they’re trying to get out of a conversation.”
I’m not very active on LW and don’t really know how people here use the term “frame”, but this is not at all how I’d define it, personally. To me, an important part about a frame (as I understand and use the term) is that much of a frame is implicit and needs to be inferred. It’s a set of assumptions baked into communication, either/both about the content of the conversation as well as about the terms of the conversation itself. These assumptions may include statements about what roles each person is to take, what certain words mean, what the purpose of the conversation is, what is to be taken for granted, what should be paid attention to, what should be ignored, and so on. Some of these assumptions may of course be made explicit in the conversation.
A lot of the time, people pick up on each others frames and do some sort of implict/explicit navigating to figure out what to do: negotiate, compromise, agree to disagree, ignore differences, fight about it, etc. Sometimes one person consciously or unconsciously submits completely to the other person’s frame. Sometimes no negotiation seems to happen at all and people end up talking past each other.
Off the cuff, I’d define “frame control” as deceptive manipulation of another person’s frame (or, some agreed-upon “shared frame”) to some selfish end. Often this will include subtly introducing assumptions, deflecting attention, verbally saying one thing while nonverbally saying another, etc.
Idk if this is a useful response to what you say, but for me the main point is that Soryu is abusive, and he both normalizes and obscures his abuse (framing what is fact harm as good).
I do think that there is a separate issue of, well, does he(/MAPLE) have a point about destruction of life, worldwide suicide cult, etc etc? And those things are worthy of discussion, and imo are pretty much entirely a separate issue.