That was way more than I was hoping to get back and went in really interesting directions—the corrections about the way the “reprocessing” works and the limits of reprocessing was helpful. The detail about the way vivid memories can no longer be accessed through the same “index” and become more like stories was totally unexpected and fascinating.
Also, that was very impressive in terms of just… raw emotional openness, I guess. I don’t know about other readers, but it stirred up my emotions just reading about your issues as you worked through them. I have a hard time imagining the courage it would take for me to make similar emotional disclosures in a place like this if they were my own. I’m a little frightened by how much trust you gave me I think? But I’m very grateful too.
(And yes, “soul dousing” is a term I made up for the post for the sake of trying to summarize things I’ve read by you in the past in my own words to see if I was hearing what you were trying to say.)
I have a hard time imagining the courage it would take for me to make similar emotional disclosures in a place like this if they were my own.
Not as much as you might think. Bear in mind that by the time anybody reads anything I’ve written about something like that, it’s no longer the least bit emotional for me—it has become an interesting anecdote about something “once upon a time”.
If it was still emotional for me after I made the changes, I would have more trouble sharing it, here or even with my subscribers. In fact, the reason I cut off the post where I did was because there was some stuff I wasn’t yet “done” with and wanted to work on some more.
Likewise, it’s a lot easier to admit to your failures and shortcomings if you are acutely aware that 1) “you” aren’t really responsible, and 2) you can change. It’s easier to face the truth of what you did wrong, if you know that your reaction will be different in the future. It takes out the “feeling of being a bad person” part of the equation.
Thanks for the response.
That was way more than I was hoping to get back and went in really interesting directions—the corrections about the way the “reprocessing” works and the limits of reprocessing was helpful. The detail about the way vivid memories can no longer be accessed through the same “index” and become more like stories was totally unexpected and fascinating.
Also, that was very impressive in terms of just… raw emotional openness, I guess. I don’t know about other readers, but it stirred up my emotions just reading about your issues as you worked through them. I have a hard time imagining the courage it would take for me to make similar emotional disclosures in a place like this if they were my own. I’m a little frightened by how much trust you gave me I think? But I’m very grateful too.
(And yes, “soul dousing” is a term I made up for the post for the sake of trying to summarize things I’ve read by you in the past in my own words to see if I was hearing what you were trying to say.)
Not as much as you might think. Bear in mind that by the time anybody reads anything I’ve written about something like that, it’s no longer the least bit emotional for me—it has become an interesting anecdote about something “once upon a time”.
If it was still emotional for me after I made the changes, I would have more trouble sharing it, here or even with my subscribers. In fact, the reason I cut off the post where I did was because there was some stuff I wasn’t yet “done” with and wanted to work on some more.
Likewise, it’s a lot easier to admit to your failures and shortcomings if you are acutely aware that 1) “you” aren’t really responsible, and 2) you can change. It’s easier to face the truth of what you did wrong, if you know that your reaction will be different in the future. It takes out the “feeling of being a bad person” part of the equation.