I find conversations more meaningful than many comparably-fun activities. What provides the meaning is my intuition about the opportunities the conversation can lead to and the update in how I’m perceived by my counterpart. As a secondary effect, conversations exercise and test my ability to think on my feet.
Flirtation can lead to sex, a coffee break chat with a collaborator can lead to a new project, a talk with anyone can lead to closer friendship. Flirtation suggests I’m more desirable than I thought, talk about projects that I’m regarded as more capable, talk with acquaintances that I’m charismatic.
These social updates and the mental exercise conversation provides are why I seek out conversation compared to many other more-fun activities. Also, I have to recognize that I probably value conversation for its own sake above and beyond these instrumental purposes. It just feels like it ought to be part of a good life aesthetic, like eating fresh fruits and vegetables.
As said by @Mateusz Bagiński , normal smalltalk is +epsilon, but some more comparisons: a short smile with a stranger or acquaintance is like eating a very tasty fruit. 90% percentile conversations are all with good friends and leave me high for a few hours. As good as a very good date. No non-social activities come close. I don’t actually remember any best particular ones, but the best ones i can recall aren’t about conversations anymore but about presence, which isn’t conversation anymore, I think. They feel extremely nourishing and meaningful and my only comparison is a really, really good IFS or therapy session.
I find conversations more meaningful than many comparably-fun activities. What provides the meaning is my intuition about the opportunities the conversation can lead to and the update in how I’m perceived by my counterpart. As a secondary effect, conversations exercise and test my ability to think on my feet.
Flirtation can lead to sex, a coffee break chat with a collaborator can lead to a new project, a talk with anyone can lead to closer friendship. Flirtation suggests I’m more desirable than I thought, talk about projects that I’m regarded as more capable, talk with acquaintances that I’m charismatic.
These social updates and the mental exercise conversation provides are why I seek out conversation compared to many other more-fun activities. Also, I have to recognize that I probably value conversation for its own sake above and beyond these instrumental purposes. It just feels like it ought to be part of a good life aesthetic, like eating fresh fruits and vegetables.
As said by @Mateusz Bagiński , normal smalltalk is +epsilon, but some more comparisons:
a short smile with a stranger or acquaintance is like eating a very tasty fruit.
90% percentile conversations are all with good friends and leave me high for a few hours. As good as a very good date. No non-social activities come close.
I don’t actually remember any best particular ones, but the best ones i can recall aren’t about conversations anymore but about presence, which isn’t conversation anymore, I think. They feel extremely nourishing and meaningful and my only comparison is a really, really good IFS or therapy session.