What level of compassion do you consider normal, expected, mandatory etc. ?

My hid­den se­cret goal is to un­der­stand the sen­ti­ments be­hind so­cial jus­tice bet­ter, how­ever I will re­frain from ask­ing ques­tions that di­rectly re­late to it, as they can be mind-kil­lers, in­stead, I have con­structed an en­tirely apoli­ti­cal, and prob­a­bly safe thought ex­per­i­ment in­volv­ing a com­mon ev­ery­day prob­lem that shouldn’t be in­ci­sive.

Alice is liv­ing in an apart­ment, she is listen­ing to mu­sic. The vol­ume of her mu­sic is well within what is al­lowed by the reg­u­la­tions or so­cial norms. Yet the neigh­bor is still com­plain­ing and wants her to turn it down, claiming that she (the neigh­bor) is un­usu­ally sen­si­tive to noise due to some kind of ear or men­tal con­di­tion.

Bob, Alice’s friend is also pre­sent, and he makes a case that while she can turn it down ba­si­cally out of nice­ness or neigh­bor­li­ness, this level of kind­ness is go­ing far be­yond the re­quire­ments of duty, and should be con­sid­ered a fa­vor, be­cause she has no eth­i­cal duty to turn it down, for the fol­low­ing rea­sons.

1) Her vol­ume level of mu­sic is usual, it is the sen­si­tivity level of the neigh­bor that is un­usual, and we are un­der no duty to cater to ev­ery spe­cial need of oth­ers.

2) In other words, it is okay to cause suffer­ing to oth­ers as long as it is a usual, com­mon, ac­cepted thing to do that would not cause suffer­ing to a typ­i­cal per­son.

The rea­sons for this are

A) It would be too hard to do oth­er­wise, to cater to ev­ery spe­cial need, in this case it is easy, but not in all cases, so this is no gen­eral prin­ci­ple.

B/​1) It would not help the other per­son much, if the other per­son is un­usu­ally sen­si­tive, the prob­lem would not be fixed by one per­son cater­ing to them. A hun­dred peo­ple should cater to it, af­ter all there are many sources of noise in the neigh­bor­hood.

B/​2) In other words, if you are un­usu­ally rude, re­duc­ing it to usual lev­els of rude­ness is effi­cient, be­cause by that one move you made a lot of peo­ple con­tent. But if you are already on the usual lev­els of rude­ness and an un­usu­ally sen­si­tive per­son is still suffer­ing, fur­ther re­duc­tion is less effi­cient be­cause you are only one of the many sources of their suffer­ing. And these peo­ple are few any­way.

C) Spe­cial needs are easy to fake.

D) Peo­ple should re­ally work on tough­en­ing up and grow­ing a thicker skin, it is ac­tu­ally pos­si­ble.

Polls in com­ments below

Please ex­plain your view in the com­ments.