Once you accept the idea that we have some obligation to try to help other people
… you have probably made a mistake already.
I’m a failed egoist. I’ve been a social worker and an educator most of my working life. You’d think I’d keep busy crushing my enemies, driving them before me, and hearing the lamentation of their women. But instead I prefer to help some people, some of the time. I, too, balance out the cost of myself with benefits to others. I do it out of preference and not obligation, but perhaps these three things I’ve figured out will still be useful to you.
If you don’t set any limitations you will do harm as well as good guaranteed. Perhaps more harm than good. Leave savior behavior to invisible monsters that live in the sky and to comic book characters.
When you’re helping directly, you can set any limitations you want. Learn from your mistakes. When you’re working within a system (a social work agency, an education system), you should follow the limitations they set. Learn from their mistakes.
If it isn’t helping, stop doing it. Maybe try something else, maybe just stop.
I find that trying to help people directly vs. indirectly have pretty different effects on me. E.g. I’m not willing to work 60 hours a week, which many people are, but I’m willing to give a lot more of my cash than most people are. Part of what I’m interested in now is how to apply what helping professionals have learned about burnout to other kinds of helping. If you want to support an important cause not just in the fervor of youth but for decades, I think some of the same anti-burnout measures help.
Most people seem to have a problem with #3, egoist or otherwise.
I guess it depends on whether your purpose is to help people, to be seen as helping people (signaling), or to alleviate guilt.
Or fourth option, which I personally espouse, to make your personal living environment as pleasant as possible. Even ineffectual donations can serve this fourth purpose; sometimes supporting values which are important to you is as important as serving those values.
… you have probably made a mistake already.
I’m a failed egoist. I’ve been a social worker and an educator most of my working life. You’d think I’d keep busy crushing my enemies, driving them before me, and hearing the lamentation of their women. But instead I prefer to help some people, some of the time. I, too, balance out the cost of myself with benefits to others. I do it out of preference and not obligation, but perhaps these three things I’ve figured out will still be useful to you.
If you don’t set any limitations you will do harm as well as good guaranteed. Perhaps more harm than good. Leave savior behavior to invisible monsters that live in the sky and to comic book characters.
When you’re helping directly, you can set any limitations you want. Learn from your mistakes. When you’re working within a system (a social work agency, an education system), you should follow the limitations they set. Learn from their mistakes.
If it isn’t helping, stop doing it. Maybe try something else, maybe just stop.
(I’m excited to see another social worker here!)
I find that trying to help people directly vs. indirectly have pretty different effects on me. E.g. I’m not willing to work 60 hours a week, which many people are, but I’m willing to give a lot more of my cash than most people are. Part of what I’m interested in now is how to apply what helping professionals have learned about burnout to other kinds of helping. If you want to support an important cause not just in the fervor of youth but for decades, I think some of the same anti-burnout measures help.
Most people seem to have a problem with #3, egoist or otherwise.
I guess it depends on whether your purpose is to help people, to be seen as helping people (signaling), or to alleviate guilt.
Or fourth option, which I personally espouse, to make your personal living environment as pleasant as possible. Even ineffectual donations can serve this fourth purpose; sometimes supporting values which are important to you is as important as serving those values.