Also in that kind of an environment, it’s not just that you run out of people who might like you. It’s also that the effect of individual people’s opinion on what everyone else thinks about you gets pronounced. E.g. if there is a clique of people who you could potentially befriend, any single one of them disliking may cause that person to badmouth you to everyone else in the clique.
So if you only have, say, 20 people you could interact with, it’s not even that you only have 20 chances to get someone to like you. At worst, if catch the ire of someone sufficiently influential, you might only get one chance.
No wonder a lot of people experience the most social anxiety when they’re teenagers. That can very well be the locally optimal strategy for many kids in e.g. your stereotypical high school.
Great point!
Also in that kind of an environment, it’s not just that you run out of people who might like you. It’s also that the effect of individual people’s opinion on what everyone else thinks about you gets pronounced. E.g. if there is a clique of people who you could potentially befriend, any single one of them disliking may cause that person to badmouth you to everyone else in the clique.
So if you only have, say, 20 people you could interact with, it’s not even that you only have 20 chances to get someone to like you. At worst, if catch the ire of someone sufficiently influential, you might only get one chance.
No wonder a lot of people experience the most social anxiety when they’re teenagers. That can very well be the locally optimal strategy for many kids in e.g. your stereotypical high school.