Just FYI, virtually no one who genuinely lacks tact believes that they lack tact. That’s the nature of the problem: there are societal norms which, if you’re aware of them, implicitly guide your behavior and, if you’re not, you will violate without even knowing it (pretty much by definition).
Well, can you point out an instance in which I’ve lacked tact? And why would this not be a virtue on LW? Truth doesn’t care about our feelings nor our morals, it’s brutal and it’s also ugly (with the exception of the beauty in mathematics).
One can talk with the goal of socializing, or with the goal of learning the truth, the two approaches are in conflict. If you attempt to do both at once, your efficiency will be terrible.
You’re only communicating if people are listening to you. If you talk in a way that causes fewer people to listen to you you’re being anything but more efficient. The goal isn’t to issue forth your great truths into the empty void—it is to be heard and understood by the greatest number of people. Tact is the avoidance of needless offense to other people. It is a cop-out to say that the only way something brutal or ugly can be communicated is to offend people in the process. What that statement actually means is that you can’t be bothered to find a tactful way to communicate.
Just FYI, virtually no one who genuinely lacks tact believes that they lack tact. That’s the nature of the problem: there are societal norms which, if you’re aware of them, implicitly guide your behavior and, if you’re not, you will violate without even knowing it (pretty much by definition).
Well, can you point out an instance in which I’ve lacked tact? And why would this not be a virtue on LW? Truth doesn’t care about our feelings nor our morals, it’s brutal and it’s also ugly (with the exception of the beauty in mathematics).
One can talk with the goal of socializing, or with the goal of learning the truth, the two approaches are in conflict. If you attempt to do both at once, your efficiency will be terrible.
You’re only communicating if people are listening to you. If you talk in a way that causes fewer people to listen to you you’re being anything but more efficient. The goal isn’t to issue forth your great truths into the empty void—it is to be heard and understood by the greatest number of people. Tact is the avoidance of needless offense to other people. It is a cop-out to say that the only way something brutal or ugly can be communicated is to offend people in the process. What that statement actually means is that you can’t be bothered to find a tactful way to communicate.