The tornado thing sounds, well, really scary. I can imagine wanting to talk through that a lot of times—or not wanting to but needing to anyway. I’m curious why you felt you lost face by having your bid for synpathy turned down, that seems to reflect poorly on the other person, not you.
Anyway if you want to vent one more time to a stranger feel free to send me a direct message.
I’m curious why you felt you lost face by having your bid for sympathy turned down, that seems to reflect poorly on the other person, not you.
I felt like I lost some face, because they were rude to me and thus revealed the friendship was not that sincere, etc; but mostly I felt that I was creating a situation where they lost face because I’m sure they would rather not appear rude, but I didn’t leave an easy way out.
...This is why I actually stopped telling people I was in the tornado—it is very difficult for a friendly person not to offer some support, as you just did. Fortunately, I’ve had lots of time discussing all the details with other people that are fascinated by weather, and now my emotional state has just modulated into an interest in all kinds of extreme weather.
I’m curious why you felt you lost face by having your bid for synpathy turned down, that seems to reflect poorly on the other person, not you.
“I don’t find your distress worthy of my attention” suggests that the other person has higher status than the one in distress, since they can dismiss the bid without needing to expect censure from others.
Thanks for the data.
The tornado thing sounds, well, really scary. I can imagine wanting to talk through that a lot of times—or not wanting to but needing to anyway. I’m curious why you felt you lost face by having your bid for synpathy turned down, that seems to reflect poorly on the other person, not you.
Anyway if you want to vent one more time to a stranger feel free to send me a direct message.
I felt like I lost some face, because they were rude to me and thus revealed the friendship was not that sincere, etc; but mostly I felt that I was creating a situation where they lost face because I’m sure they would rather not appear rude, but I didn’t leave an easy way out.
...This is why I actually stopped telling people I was in the tornado—it is very difficult for a friendly person not to offer some support, as you just did. Fortunately, I’ve had lots of time discussing all the details with other people that are fascinated by weather, and now my emotional state has just modulated into an interest in all kinds of extreme weather.
“I don’t find your distress worthy of my attention” suggests that the other person has higher status than the one in distress, since they can dismiss the bid without needing to expect censure from others.