Don’t put yourself into positions of insecurity. […]
This seems like it points in the wrong direction to me. I’d instead say something like “look for your own insecurities and then look closely the ones you find”. But the current thing you’ve said sounds like “avoid wherever your insecurities might manifest (because they’re fixed)”.
I think there’s a commonly-held belief that a feeling of belonging is something that we can get from other people, but I think this is a misconception. Stable confidence doesn’t come from knowing that other people like you.
Note: It’s not that we can get a feeling of belonging entirely from ourselves, either— it’s more nuanced than that. Alfred Adler, father of Individual Psychology, said quite a bit about this, and I’m currently drafting a sequence that touches on this.
Agreed in principle, though it’s worth noting that more resourced people tend to have less insecurities in general. People who have a stable family, no economic insecurity, positive peer support, etc, end up less susceptible to cults, as well as bad social dynamics in general.
This isn’t to say that people can’t create stable confidence for themselves without those things, only that “dependent confidence” is also a thing that people can have instead that acts protectively, or exposes risk.
This seems like it points in the wrong direction to me. I’d instead say something like “look for your own insecurities and then look closely the ones you find”. But the current thing you’ve said sounds like “avoid wherever your insecurities might manifest (because they’re fixed)”.
[How to resolve insecurities? Coherence Therapy.]
I think there’s a commonly-held belief that a feeling of belonging is something that we can get from other people, but I think this is a misconception. Stable confidence doesn’t come from knowing that other people like you.
Note: It’s not that we can get a feeling of belonging entirely from ourselves, either— it’s more nuanced than that. Alfred Adler, father of Individual Psychology, said quite a bit about this, and I’m currently drafting a sequence that touches on this.
Agreed in principle, though it’s worth noting that more resourced people tend to have less insecurities in general. People who have a stable family, no economic insecurity, positive peer support, etc, end up less susceptible to cults, as well as bad social dynamics in general.
This isn’t to say that people can’t create stable confidence for themselves without those things, only that “dependent confidence” is also a thing that people can have instead that acts protectively, or exposes risk.