Yes, I’m well aware of what iambic tetrameter is and that the poem generally conforms to it :-). The intended meter isn’t quite that simple though. The final verse of each stanza is only three feet, and the first foot of the third verse of each stanza is a spondee. Verses are headless where necessary.
There’s also an inverted foot in “Be the test later or done?”, but I’m leaving that in even though I could easily substitute “ahead” for “later”. Despite breaking the meter, it sounds better as-is.
The intended meter isn’t quite that simple though.
Fair enough. I found other aspects of the poem so awkward, though, that I never actually finished any one full stanza without wincing. The rhythm seemed like the one thing I could offer a semi-objective opinion on, and I figured that maybe some of the other things that were bothering me were a result of you trying to fit a meter without conscious awareness of what meter you were trying to fit.
Yes, I’m well aware of what iambic tetrameter is and that the poem generally conforms to it :-). The intended meter isn’t quite that simple though. The final verse of each stanza is only three feet, and the first foot of the third verse of each stanza is a spondee. Verses are headless where necessary.
There’s also an inverted foot in “Be the test later or done?”, but I’m leaving that in even though I could easily substitute “ahead” for “later”. Despite breaking the meter, it sounds better as-is.
Fair enough. I found other aspects of the poem so awkward, though, that I never actually finished any one full stanza without wincing. The rhythm seemed like the one thing I could offer a semi-objective opinion on, and I figured that maybe some of the other things that were bothering me were a result of you trying to fit a meter without conscious awareness of what meter you were trying to fit.