The 12 section headings under “Failure modes” are: Confidence, Frustration, Lashing out, Condescension, Nonrespect, Dismissal, Disdain, Disbelieving you, Harshness, Tunnel vision, Retaliation, and Stoneface. The elements in your quoted section appear to me to come up here (e.g. Lashing out, Tunnel vision, Dismissal, etc).
I don’t say it’s a successful document. My first guess is that a more successful version of the doc (edit: or at least a doc that successfully conveys what to expect when interacting with the author) would be shorter and focus on giving a more grounded sense of “here are concrete instances of the peak good and bad interactions I’ve had with people, and some sense of the modal interaction type”. It might include content like “I’ve talked to N people who’ve said they’ve had life-changingly positive interactions with me, and M people who’ve said as a result they were really substantively hurt by interacting with me and wish to indefinitely avoid me, here’s some properties of the interactions they described, also here’s a survey on general properties of how people find me to be in conversation, split out between friends and colleagues”.
However I think that the sort of doc I’m describing is ~unheard of in any setting and way more effort than ~anyone I’m aware of has put into this sort of widespread expectation setting with lots of colleagues and collaborators (I’d say the same for the linked doc that Nate drafted), and people typically do not have much obligation to let people know about bad interactions. Heck, in many countries people can get criminal records expunged so that they don’t have to inform their future employers about them, which is worlds apart from handing someone a doc listing times when people they’ve talked to have felt burned by the interaction, which reads to me like a standard being demanded elsethread.
The 12 section headings under “Failure modes” are: Confidence, Frustration, Lashing out, Condescension, Nonrespect, Dismissal, Disdain, Disbelieving you, Harshness, Tunnel vision, Retaliation, and Stoneface. The elements in your quoted section appear to me to come up here (e.g. Lashing out, Tunnel vision, Dismissal, etc).
I don’t say it’s a successful document. My first guess is that a more successful version of the doc (edit: or at least a doc that successfully conveys what to expect when interacting with the author) would be shorter and focus on giving a more grounded sense of “here are concrete instances of the peak good and bad interactions I’ve had with people, and some sense of the modal interaction type”. It might include content like “I’ve talked to N people who’ve said they’ve had life-changingly positive interactions with me, and M people who’ve said as a result they were really substantively hurt by interacting with me and wish to indefinitely avoid me, here’s some properties of the interactions they described, also here’s a survey on general properties of how people find me to be in conversation, split out between friends and colleagues”.
However I think that the sort of doc I’m describing is ~unheard of in any setting and way more effort than ~anyone I’m aware of has put into this sort of widespread expectation setting with lots of colleagues and collaborators (I’d say the same for the linked doc that Nate drafted), and people typically do not have much obligation to let people know about bad interactions. Heck, in many countries people can get criminal records expunged so that they don’t have to inform their future employers about them, which is worlds apart from handing someone a doc listing times when people they’ve talked to have felt burned by the interaction, which reads to me like a standard being demanded elsethread.