Pro1: Yes. Ask your neckbeard friend to consent to a test that will not be physically harmful but may cause emotional triggering. Then pretend to slap or munch him in the face. Do you get a panicky, nervous reaction, like turtling up and blinking, or you get a “manly” one like leaning back and catching your hand? This predicts if he is used to fighting back, or used to getting beaten and not daring to fight.
This doesn’t have anything to do with self hatred. Your writing isn’t focused.
You make a lot of points but don’t commit to making any in depths.
Would people who hate themselves benefit from raising their self esteem? Of course. But you don’t need to talk about nerds to do so. Not every nerd hates themselves and not every person who hates themselves is a nerd.
Dropping a nuke on your social shyness by joining Toastmasters—a writer should be able to give a speech on a podium? Toastmasters International (and the later is not just a name, they are in Europe etc. too) says on the can that they are about public speaking skills, which is true, but public speaking is simply the hardest kind of speaking for introverted, shy, or self-hating people, go through the Comm manual giving the 10 speeches, participate in table topics, and compared to that 1:1 socializing or chatting will be easy.
I am a Competent Communicator by Toastmasters standards but I don’t think that translates directly into 1:1 interactions. Being on stage is a different skill than small talk.
You need to get in touch with your inner animal a bit, and that is not karate.
Do you have experience of karate or know people who didn’t get much from it?
This is why it was a primary way to teach British intellectual boys to man up.
Could you reference the claim that it was the primary sport of British intellectual boys for some value of “primary”?
Your writing isn’t focused. You make a lot of points but don’t commit to making any in depths.
I know, because this all is very introductory. The whole set of problems is not studied yet at all, so I am just doing the scope-work basiclly i.e. what may play a role.
But you don’t need to talk about nerds to do so. Not every nerd hates themselves and not every person who hates themselves is a nerd.
It is a definition issue. I don’t mean STEM-geeks, I mean people who use escapist-heroic fantasy. That is a clear sign. People who hate themselves usually find a way to fantasize about being a hero.
I am a Competent Communicator by Toastmasters standards but I don’t think that translates directly into 1:1 interactions. Being on stage is a different skill than small talk.
There is the table topics and the fact that in the breaks people 1) try harder than usual to socialize, even when they normally the type who does not do this, but they understand that these evenings are dedicated to communication 2) they are super nice at it, non-judgemental, non-competitive, it is not like going to a party where everybody is basically bragging and trying to undermine your status to raise theirs.
Do you have experience of karate or know people who didn’t get much from it?
Yes, we did kyokushinkai and there was hardly any kumite, moreover it was always stopped at the first landed punch or kick.
Could you reference the claim that it was the primary sport of British intellectual boys for some value of “primary”?
From online articles, I can copy weak-middling evidence, clearly it would take offline research to make it better evidenced:
“Boxing was once taught in British state schools. Contrary to what you might think, it was never actually banned, but simply died out around the time of the Beatles’ first LP.” ” Boxing is the martial art of the West, as integral to our sports culture as kung fu in China, karate and judo in Japan and taekwondo in Korea.” “And although the state schools gave up teaching boxing in 1962, in the great private schools they never stopped believing in the healing power of boxing. And that is why the only men I know who boxed at school all went to Eton.”
Argentine: http://www.irlandeses.org/mccarthy2.htm ” Cashel-born Paddy McCarthy (1871-1963) went to Argentina in 1900 and worked as a teacher, coach, referee, professional player and boxer in public and private schools.” “Football and boxing were some of the athletic activities of the upper-classes of Buenos Aires and other Argentine cities. They were restricted to men and perceived as manly activities. Although in the beginning these activities were limited to the English-speaking community, by the time McCarthy and other professional players and trainers were active in Argentina, members of the local elite were actively involved.” So this article suggests it has even spread internationally on an upper-class basis, as the upper-classes of Argentine imitated British upper classes.
Of course I am conflating upper-class with intellectual. I think these two terms are very related, at least historically if not today. Both meant not being hardened not only in body but also in mind and heart by an upbringing of working on the fields at 10, but rather being able to afford a childhood spent indoors with books. This ought to make one more learned, but it also makes one kind of cowardly, lacking the courage-practice, lacking the challenges to toughen up, not necessarily in body but primarily in mind and heart.
The whole set of problems is not studied yet at all, so I am just doing the scope-work basiclly i.e. what may play a role.
I don’t believe that’s the case. I don’t think that self-hating isn’t studied at all.
It is a definition issue. I don’t mean STEM-geeks, I mean people who use escapist-heroic fantasy. That is a clear sign. People who hate themselves usually find a way to fantasize about being a hero.
There are many ways to escape reality besides fantasizing being a hero.
Having a hero that serve as a role model can also be valuable.
There is the table topics and the fact that in the breaks people 1) try harder than usual to socialize, even when they normally the type who does not do this, but they understand that these evenings are dedicated to communication 2) they are super nice at it, non-judgemental, non-competitive, it is not like going to a party where everybody is basically bragging and trying to undermine your status to raise theirs.
How much time have you spent at toastmasters? I have spent 4 1⁄2 years. I know how it works.
Empirically in the years I spent at toastmasters my 1:1 interaction skills didn’t improve as much as they did in the last years.
I don’t think that self-hating isn’t studied at all.
More like its coping strategies and the social effects thereof not being studied. The issue is, people just thing they like e.g. D&D, they don’t know they are doing it to cope with self-hatred. On the other hand, psychologists study self-hatred but do not look into the hobbies it causes and the social response of them.
There are many ways to escape reality besides fantasizing being a hero.
Such as drugs, but the point here is not the escaping the reality of circumstances but ones own self.
TM: Not much, about 6 months. Still it helped me ease up. I accept the argument that it is only an initial boost if you are very tight to begin with.
This doesn’t have anything to do with self hatred. Your writing isn’t focused. You make a lot of points but don’t commit to making any in depths.
Would people who hate themselves benefit from raising their self esteem? Of course. But you don’t need to talk about nerds to do so. Not every nerd hates themselves and not every person who hates themselves is a nerd.
I am a Competent Communicator by Toastmasters standards but I don’t think that translates directly into 1:1 interactions. Being on stage is a different skill than small talk.
Do you have experience of karate or know people who didn’t get much from it?
Could you reference the claim that it was the primary sport of British intellectual boys for some value of “primary”?
I know, because this all is very introductory. The whole set of problems is not studied yet at all, so I am just doing the scope-work basiclly i.e. what may play a role.
It is a definition issue. I don’t mean STEM-geeks, I mean people who use escapist-heroic fantasy. That is a clear sign. People who hate themselves usually find a way to fantasize about being a hero.
There is the table topics and the fact that in the breaks people 1) try harder than usual to socialize, even when they normally the type who does not do this, but they understand that these evenings are dedicated to communication 2) they are super nice at it, non-judgemental, non-competitive, it is not like going to a party where everybody is basically bragging and trying to undermine your status to raise theirs.
Yes, we did kyokushinkai and there was hardly any kumite, moreover it was always stopped at the first landed punch or kick.
From online articles, I can copy weak-middling evidence, clearly it would take offline research to make it better evidenced:
http://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/comment/articles/2013-09/06/tony-parsons-boxing-mike-tyson-carl-froch/viewall
“Boxing was once taught in British state schools. Contrary to what you might think, it was never actually banned, but simply died out around the time of the Beatles’ first LP.” ” Boxing is the martial art of the West, as integral to our sports culture as kung fu in China, karate and judo in Japan and taekwondo in Korea.” “And although the state schools gave up teaching boxing in 1962, in the great private schools they never stopped believing in the healing power of boxing. And that is why the only men I know who boxed at school all went to Eton.”
Argentine: http://www.irlandeses.org/mccarthy2.htm ” Cashel-born Paddy McCarthy (1871-1963) went to Argentina in 1900 and worked as a teacher, coach, referee, professional player and boxer in public and private schools.” “Football and boxing were some of the athletic activities of the upper-classes of Buenos Aires and other Argentine cities. They were restricted to men and perceived as manly activities. Although in the beginning these activities were limited to the English-speaking community, by the time McCarthy and other professional players and trainers were active in Argentina, members of the local elite were actively involved.” So this article suggests it has even spread internationally on an upper-class basis, as the upper-classes of Argentine imitated British upper classes.
Of course I am conflating upper-class with intellectual. I think these two terms are very related, at least historically if not today. Both meant not being hardened not only in body but also in mind and heart by an upbringing of working on the fields at 10, but rather being able to afford a childhood spent indoors with books. This ought to make one more learned, but it also makes one kind of cowardly, lacking the courage-practice, lacking the challenges to toughen up, not necessarily in body but primarily in mind and heart.
I don’t believe that’s the case. I don’t think that self-hating isn’t studied at all.
There are many ways to escape reality besides fantasizing being a hero.
Having a hero that serve as a role model can also be valuable.
How much time have you spent at toastmasters? I have spent 4 1⁄2 years. I know how it works. Empirically in the years I spent at toastmasters my 1:1 interaction skills didn’t improve as much as they did in the last years.
More like its coping strategies and the social effects thereof not being studied. The issue is, people just thing they like e.g. D&D, they don’t know they are doing it to cope with self-hatred. On the other hand, psychologists study self-hatred but do not look into the hobbies it causes and the social response of them.
Such as drugs, but the point here is not the escaping the reality of circumstances but ones own self.
TM: Not much, about 6 months. Still it helped me ease up. I accept the argument that it is only an initial boost if you are very tight to begin with.