[Question] Building awareness habits (cognitive)

Something I struggle with (probably largely due to ADHD) is building habits/​patterns of being aware of things I want to notice/​practice cognitively.

For example, I find myself easily becoming somewhat thoughtless in social situations, in that I do not stop to observe, think, and measure my actions and responses at all. I have, for a couple years now, been intending to work on this, and not really doing anything to act on this intention. I often plan to step back and just observe in social situations, but never do.

Since I struggle with this, I figure that the best thing I can do now is try and pick up some strategies for both reminding myself to think back to cognitive patterns I want to build when I enter into the relevant situation, and for doing said things.

So, does anyone have suggestions on how one can:

  • More consistently remember something they want to watch out for in various situations (especially social/​fast-paced situations)

  • Build new mental patterns/​habits (in general)

  • Effectively observe social situations as they occur, in person, to learn from the interactions in order to develop social skills (bonus if the strategy allows for one to not appear/​be awkward or violate social etiquette)

  • Somewhat less relevantly, banish aversions to human connection/​intimacies that make things like eye contact difficult/​overwhelming (the aversion is mostly habitual at this point)

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