Wheel of Consent Theory for Rationalists and Effective Altruists

If you feel like you never get what you want, this could be a very interesting framework for you, because it can show that maybe you aren’t asking for it in the right way.

Have you ever believed that giving to others was the way to get what you wanted from them? The idea being that if you do something for them they will reciprocate.

I have and it was quite a frustrating way of looking at the world.

At this workshop you will discover a new conceptual model which brings greater detail to the dynamics of receiving and giving in relationships, work and life.

When we engage someone – whether it is a colleague, stakeholder, friend or lover – are we doing what they want , or what they allow ? What is the difference, and why does it matter?

Have you ever received a ‘gift’ that you did not want? Maybe an Xmas jumper that you would never wear that needed to go straight to the charity shop. Or perhaps you were gifted a course on throwing pots from your pottery enthusiast partner, despite you not wanting to be anywhere near clay. If the ‘gift’ is something that you don’t want, is it really a gift and who is it really for?
Join us for an evening at Newspeak House exploring the theory and practice of this new model which allows us to clearly define who is doing and who it is for.

In this session, we will build up a basic understanding of the model and hold a discussion on how it might be deployed in EA and Rationalist thinking.

The Wheel shows us four types of relating within clear agreements.

→ Serving another for their benefit, we do an action they want—within our boundaries
→ Accepting the gift of another’s service, they do what we want while maintaining their boundaries
→ Taking an action for our own benefit – doing what we want – while respecting the giver’s boundaries;
→ Allowing another to take from us – they do what they want with our permission – while maintaining our boundaries.

Often these dynamics can become confused in our work and personal relationships. Unless we take them apart and experience each of these four aspects, it is impossible to know what they really are.

Understanding and embodying the Wheel of Consent happens best through a somatic experience – you have to feel it in your skin. Therefore, learning the Wheel happens through touch exercises.

Please note that there is no requirement to touch or be touched in order to take part in this evening, there are multiple ways to engage with the themes and exercises offered.

This session is led by Adam Wilder (adamwilder.com), social entrepreneur and certified Wheel of Consent facilitator. You can contact Adam through the contact organiser button on Eventbrite or Adam at Togetherness dot com.

We are delighted to present this evening at Newspeak House, 133 Bethnal Green Rd, London E2 7DGTT

Tickets are offered on a pay what you want basis with a suggested price of £55

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