I’m looking to get some additional practice from another person. However, given my relationship with my “instructor”, that isn’t an option. I’m hoping you can read between the lines here.
That’s the advantage of market norms over social norms. Paying service providers buys you the option of firing them. If you have the money, maybe say you want to move on to paid-for driving lessons from pros?
It’s an option. Maybe it comes with costs you have decided you do not want to pay, but does it really, and have you really, consciously, rationally evaluated that? Ok, the way I’m asking that suggests I suspect the answer may be “no”, but that’s just based on general life experience, and the hint provided by the contradiction between your first sentence and your second. I can’t speak to your particular situation, however much reading I do between the faint lines you’ve sketched.
But the bottom line is, if your “instructor” sucks at instructing, then one way or another you need to drop them.
Sounds like a close and hostile personal relationship in which they are abusing some sort of power over you. Sounds like something you need to get away from as soon as possible.
So—again, just speculating between the lines—the person supposedly teaching you is instead trying to prevent you from learning, so you can’t get your driving licence and leave?
In this case no, the person does want me to drive, the conflict comes from eir arrogance and social debt I owe em. I’ve made some progress in communicating my concerns to em, so that’s good at least. My comment was more of a frustration that the good advice to get away in fact would exacerbate my current predictament in some sense.
I guess so as well. Nevertheless, there are ways of communicating that their instruction isn’t working, or to get them to do it differently, that need not leave anyone with hurt feelings. It might even be better for the relationship to look elsewhere. Marriages can break up when one partner tries to give driving lessons to the other.
I’m looking to get some additional practice from another person. However, given my relationship with my “instructor”, that isn’t an option. I’m hoping you can read between the lines here.
That’s the advantage of market norms over social norms. Paying service providers buys you the option of firing them. If you have the money, maybe say you want to move on to paid-for driving lessons from pros?
It’s an option. Maybe it comes with costs you have decided you do not want to pay, but does it really, and have you really, consciously, rationally evaluated that? Ok, the way I’m asking that suggests I suspect the answer may be “no”, but that’s just based on general life experience, and the hint provided by the contradiction between your first sentence and your second. I can’t speak to your particular situation, however much reading I do between the faint lines you’ve sketched.
But the bottom line is, if your “instructor” sucks at instructing, then one way or another you need to drop them.
I’m guessing the instructor has a close personal relationship with the OP.
Correct. Attempts to disengage have lead to conflict and threats.
Sounds like a close and hostile personal relationship in which they are abusing some sort of power over you. Sounds like something you need to get away from as soon as possible.
Ironically, having my license is necessary for such a step.
So—again, just speculating between the lines—the person supposedly teaching you is instead trying to prevent you from learning, so you can’t get your driving licence and leave?
In this case no, the person does want me to drive, the conflict comes from eir arrogance and social debt I owe em. I’ve made some progress in communicating my concerns to em, so that’s good at least. My comment was more of a frustration that the good advice to get away in fact would exacerbate my current predictament in some sense.
You might be overfitting; many people are controlling jerks without being abusive. Yet IAWYC.
I guess so as well. Nevertheless, there are ways of communicating that their instruction isn’t working, or to get them to do it differently, that need not leave anyone with hurt feelings. It might even be better for the relationship to look elsewhere. Marriages can break up when one partner tries to give driving lessons to the other.