This post is excellent because it puts into words thoughts I imagine many others have been thinking about for quite some time, but haven’t taken the time to put into words.
The seed for my transition was probably born out of similar reasons. However, it doesn’t feel so existentially dreadful for me to realise this, probably because when I was young, I committed to a belief of “yeah, whatever, I’ll try this, it’s probably an interesting way to live life anyways, even if it doesn’t work. How hard could it be?”
Actually transition is quite hard and is not a sufficient method to receive the same moe-love I feel for anime girls doing cute things. I consciously accept that now. But I guess an unconscious part of me still irrationally believes that I’ll one day recieve the same unconditional love and appreciation I feel for moe anime girls. My transition is probably fueled in no small part by the protection of sunk cost towards this goal.
And again, yes, that should be an existentially dreadful realisation, but maybe I’ve been honest with myself from the start about that, and always viewed transition as an experiment, so it really isn’t so bad.
I suppose then, what’s “the” reason people transition is an incorrect question. Wanting to be moe was 1 reason for me to want to transition. After discovering that isn’t possible though, I never felt that gutted. Clearly there are more reasons people transition. Finding those reasons is still hard though because people are not good at being honest about those reasons.
How come we adjust stock returns for inflation down to 7%, but we don’t adjust mortgage returns for inflation down to 1%? This isn’t a “gotcha” question, I’m genuinely wondering about the reason for doing this.