The disgust/disappointment you describe sounds to me like contempt. In this context the opposite of contempt is compassion, which I would consider the point of empathizing with someone.
In the past, I’d feel the same kind of contempt when observing people demonstrating lack of skill in an area I had ability in, particularly when their lack would impact me in a (slightly) negative manner. That changed when I learned to have more compassion for myself despite my own weaknesses. Once I did that, the feelings of contempt for others seemed to diminish significantly.
The pathway, as best I understand it, was “This person, like me, is trying to do the best they can with the knowledge, ability, and responsibilities they have, just like I am. I have (different) failings of my own that I deserve compassion for. Having contempt for them is hypocritical of me.”
Having compassion for oneself is something that makes you stronger and more mentally resilient. Compassion for others seems to come along with it.
By ‘best they can’ I didn’t necessarily mean ‘self-actualize’ or ‘contribute as a net positive’ but more like ‘navigate the difficult demands of life.’
By that understanding, I think most people I encounter fit this description.
The disgust/disappointment you describe sounds to me like contempt. In this context the opposite of contempt is compassion, which I would consider the point of empathizing with someone.
In the past, I’d feel the same kind of contempt when observing people demonstrating lack of skill in an area I had ability in, particularly when their lack would impact me in a (slightly) negative manner. That changed when I learned to have more compassion for myself despite my own weaknesses. Once I did that, the feelings of contempt for others seemed to diminish significantly.
The pathway, as best I understand it, was “This person, like me, is trying to do the best they can with the knowledge, ability, and responsibilities they have, just like I am. I have (different) failings of my own that I deserve compassion for. Having contempt for them is hypocritical of me.”
Having compassion for oneself is something that makes you stronger and more mentally resilient. Compassion for others seems to come along with it.
But many (maybe most) people are not, in fact, trying to do the best they can with what they have.
By ‘best they can’ I didn’t necessarily mean ‘self-actualize’ or ‘contribute as a net positive’ but more like ‘navigate the difficult demands of life.’
By that understanding, I think most people I encounter fit this description.
Apologies for the imprecision.