Don’t go bullshitting me about how a kind and compassionate life of mediocrity is a “different kind of strength” or some such cope. But subject to that constraint, I would certainly like better ways of relating to people.
Perhaps it is not true for you, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you have not experienced this much given the confusion around “companionship” in some previous discussions, but I think there is a literary trope of “discovering the power of friendship” (cue your eye roll here) which is actually real in some important ways. Without attempting anything thorough here and trying to keep things as john-frame-native as possible, I expect that the strengthening-not-weakening thing is that having others who care about you (read, in this context, but there is much more, as: who can/will sympathize with you even if they think you could be trying harder) gives most people more energy and motivation to go do positive things that are harder / more unpleasant than they might otherwise have done. And failed attempts are less draining (and therefore also less prospectively daunting) when you have sympathy from those you love, regardless of whether they think on reflection that you tried hard enough on that failed attempt. Kind and compassionate =\= mediocre. (Though it can, if provided in an enabling way to someone who is vulnerable to being enabled in ways they would regret on reflection. I strongly think though that you should largely strive to ignore this dynamic in your thinking as a salve to focusing overmuch on it IMO)
Perhaps it is not true for you, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you have not experienced this much given the confusion around “companionship” in some previous discussions, but I think there is a literary trope of “discovering the power of friendship” (cue your eye roll here) which is actually real in some important ways. Without attempting anything thorough here and trying to keep things as john-frame-native as possible, I expect that the strengthening-not-weakening thing is that having others who care about you (read, in this context, but there is much more, as: who can/will sympathize with you even if they think you could be trying harder) gives most people more energy and motivation to go do positive things that are harder / more unpleasant than they might otherwise have done. And failed attempts are less draining (and therefore also less prospectively daunting) when you have sympathy from those you love, regardless of whether they think on reflection that you tried hard enough on that failed attempt. Kind and compassionate =\= mediocre. (Though it can, if provided in an enabling way to someone who is vulnerable to being enabled in ways they would regret on reflection. I strongly think though that you should largely strive to ignore this dynamic in your thinking as a salve to focusing overmuch on it IMO)