Sounds like this agency thing is so central to how you orient to the world that you’re bringing it with you when you try to empathize with someone (at least if they’re human).
If you want to try to do something more like the sort of empathizing that other people talk about, you could try:
Imagining some other scenario where the way that you would relate to that other scenario matches the way that this person is relating to the scenario that they’re in.
Finding a case where someone is showing some of the agency thing, in a context where you wouldn’t, and empathize with them in that scenario. (This can also help with doing 1, if you also notice how you relate to this context where you wouldn’t show that agency thing, because it adds to your collection of ‘other scenarios’ which could match how someone else engages with a scenario where you would have more agency.)
Empathizing with people in contexts that are orthogonal to the agency thing, where how much agency a person is showing isn’t central to what’s happening. (Perhaps someone liking a book/movie/hobby/etc. that you don’t like?)
Sounds like this agency thing is so central to how you orient to the world that you’re bringing it with you when you try to empathize with someone (at least if they’re human).
If you want to try to do something more like the sort of empathizing that other people talk about, you could try:
Imagining some other scenario where the way that you would relate to that other scenario matches the way that this person is relating to the scenario that they’re in.
Finding a case where someone is showing some of the agency thing, in a context where you wouldn’t, and empathize with them in that scenario. (This can also help with doing 1, if you also notice how you relate to this context where you wouldn’t show that agency thing, because it adds to your collection of ‘other scenarios’ which could match how someone else engages with a scenario where you would have more agency.)
Empathizing with people in contexts that are orthogonal to the agency thing, where how much agency a person is showing isn’t central to what’s happening. (Perhaps someone liking a book/movie/hobby/etc. that you don’t like?)