This post is definitely part of the answer to the puzzle of my social phobic spidey-sense. Mine first came on as a symptom of my Schizo-Affective Disorder. People always ask me what I’m scared of and what’s the worst thing that could happen, I rarely consider either it just happens. Nowadays it’s a lot less strong than it was, I’m worst around my neighbors and their children. I have wondered if it could have something to do with chimp like DNA and to the sub-conscious it’s like being around my pack but not known nor accepted. I’d feel a lot better about being in my driveway if I was liked/accepted by all around. I actively seem to indeed be avoiding being disliked by not going out there. Although it might not be as simple as that as at Christmas I’m surrounded by friends and family who all like me, though when they all start talking over each other loudly about insignificant topics alarm bells ring loud until I’m back at home alone. Another part of the answer that I suspect is that my sub-conscious doesn’t like a “profoundly sick society”. I don’t see rationality in most things outside my house, modern life is beyond bizarre. Though if I were outdoors and everyone liked/accepted/cared about me, if there were no great chances of dislikes I guess I’d be a lot happier with the situation. Though if they start acting in crazed ways like the cacophony of nonsensical loud communication at Christmas I would still freak.
This post is definitely part of the answer to the puzzle of my social phobic spidey-sense. Mine first came on as a symptom of my Schizo-Affective Disorder. People always ask me what I’m scared of and what’s the worst thing that could happen, I rarely consider either it just happens.
Nowadays it’s a lot less strong than it was, I’m worst around my neighbors and their children. I have wondered if it could have something to do with chimp like DNA and to the sub-conscious it’s like being around my pack but not known nor accepted. I’d feel a lot better about being in my driveway if I was liked/accepted by all around. I actively seem to indeed be avoiding being disliked by not going out there.
Although it might not be as simple as that as at Christmas I’m surrounded by friends and family who all like me, though when they all start talking over each other loudly about insignificant topics alarm bells ring loud until I’m back at home alone.
Another part of the answer that I suspect is that my sub-conscious doesn’t like a “profoundly sick society”. I don’t see rationality in most things outside my house, modern life is beyond bizarre. Though if I were outdoors and everyone liked/accepted/cared about me, if there were no great chances of dislikes I guess I’d be a lot happier with the situation. Though if they start acting in crazed ways like the cacophony of nonsensical loud communication at Christmas I would still freak.