“older the human beings” → “older than human beings”
“copper metal cube 16 centimeters in diameter” → “copper cube 16 centimeters to an edge”
“stuck out your throat” → “stick out your throat”
“exame” → “exam”
“to boy is about to die” → “to a boy who is about to die”
Except for the crucial paragraph near the end, the style reads more like Herbert than Lsusr. Good job.
Thank you for the kind words and the corrections. I have fixed the errors you pointed out.
“older the human beings” → “older than human beings”
“copper metal cube 16 centimeters in diameter” → “copper cube 16 centimeters to an edge”
“stuck out your throat” → “stick out your throat”
“exame” → “exam”
“to boy is about to die” → “to a boy who is about to die”
Except for the crucial paragraph near the end, the style reads more like Herbert than Lsusr. Good job.
Thank you for the kind words and the corrections. I have fixed the errors you pointed out.