I used to play paintball competitively, and when I first got into the competitive scene I started making aggressive moves no matter what my instincts said because my instincts were wrong. I did this to train my instincts, and it worked. I quickly figured out when I could make moves and when I couldn’t. This process allowed me to adjust my instincts as I started competing against better opponents—where making moves is much more difficult.
A perfect parable for learning social skills. The consequences for social failures nowadays, like those for getting shot with a paint ball, are not the death that our instincts expect.
Yep. There are negative consequences in both cases—rejection and social awkwardness in one, stinging welts and possibly losing a game in the other- but the long term consequences are worth it.
I used to play paintball competitively, and when I first got into the competitive scene I started making aggressive moves no matter what my instincts said because my instincts were wrong. I did this to train my instincts, and it worked. I quickly figured out when I could make moves and when I couldn’t. This process allowed me to adjust my instincts as I started competing against better opponents—where making moves is much more difficult.
A perfect parable for learning social skills. The consequences for social failures nowadays, like those for getting shot with a paint ball, are not the death that our instincts expect.
Yep. There are negative consequences in both cases—rejection and social awkwardness in one, stinging welts and possibly losing a game in the other- but the long term consequences are worth it.