I know that I am being run by agents with different goal systems. I’ve successfully fought my unconscious mind over the question of how many calories I ought to be eating. But I would never consider negotiating with that mind.
When intoxicated, I’m still me, but less capable of thinking. Same level of intelligence, but I can’t hold as many things in my head at one time. Like three-quarters of my registers have been disabled and I lose all my cycles to loads and stores. That, and euphoria, followed by nausea. So if I make a judgment error while intoxicated it is because I didn’t have the time to think it out.
One thing that I am better at in a hypomanic state is interacting with people. I’m exciting (because I’m excited) and interesting (because I’m interested), and generally fun, funny and friendly. Normally, I avoid meeting people, and find long social interactions emotionally draining.
I bring this up because I’ve often heard this as a reason people drink. Some people become “people people” when intoxicated. Their relative weighing of the utility of personal interaction goes up, while the emotional cost to them might even change sign. This is the kind of thing that I meant; not impaired choices, but alternate choices. Again, maybe that doesn’t happen to you, but I assume you’re aware of the phenomenon.
Note: some people use alcohol to abate shyness; this isn’t what I mean. I mean changing the desirability of something, not just reducing barriers to get to it.
It is hard to be aware of what is really going on… The conscious mind is more fragmented than it wants to admit. Recently I attempted to exhale and prevent myself from breathing until I lost consciousness. But my mind subsequently made the decision to inhale, while still conscious, each time I repeated the experiment. The odd thing was that it felt exactly like I had made a conscious decision to inhale. It sort of made me realize that the conscious mind precomitting to not inhale and the conscious mind that really wants to breathe are two separate agents.
I know that I am being run by agents with different goal systems. I’ve successfully fought my unconscious mind over the question of how many calories I ought to be eating. But I would never consider negotiating with that mind.
When intoxicated, I’m still me, but less capable of thinking. Same level of intelligence, but I can’t hold as many things in my head at one time. Like three-quarters of my registers have been disabled and I lose all my cycles to loads and stores. That, and euphoria, followed by nausea. So if I make a judgment error while intoxicated it is because I didn’t have the time to think it out.
One thing that I am better at in a hypomanic state is interacting with people. I’m exciting (because I’m excited) and interesting (because I’m interested), and generally fun, funny and friendly. Normally, I avoid meeting people, and find long social interactions emotionally draining.
I bring this up because I’ve often heard this as a reason people drink. Some people become “people people” when intoxicated. Their relative weighing of the utility of personal interaction goes up, while the emotional cost to them might even change sign. This is the kind of thing that I meant; not impaired choices, but alternate choices. Again, maybe that doesn’t happen to you, but I assume you’re aware of the phenomenon.
Note: some people use alcohol to abate shyness; this isn’t what I mean. I mean changing the desirability of something, not just reducing barriers to get to it.
It is hard to be aware of what is really going on… The conscious mind is more fragmented than it wants to admit. Recently I attempted to exhale and prevent myself from breathing until I lost consciousness. But my mind subsequently made the decision to inhale, while still conscious, each time I repeated the experiment. The odd thing was that it felt exactly like I had made a conscious decision to inhale. It sort of made me realize that the conscious mind precomitting to not inhale and the conscious mind that really wants to breathe are two separate agents.