Good post, I largely agree with your point. This part in particular is relevant:
If I’m doing full-contact psychoanalysis, the problem with “I don’t think you’re here in good faith” is that it’s insufficiently specific. Rather than accusing someone of generic “bad faith”, the way to move the discussion forward is by positing that one’s interlocutor has some specific motive that hasn’t yet been made explicit—and the way to defend oneself against such an accusation is by making the case that one’s real agenda isn’t the one being proposed, rather than protesting one’s “good faith” and implausibly claiming not to have an agenda.
I get accused of bad faith regularly (whether the accusation is earnest and made in “good faith” is another question) and I agree completely that a naked denial doesn’t accomplish anything. Like you, I usually can see what the accusation is based on and so what I do is acknowledge that the suspicion is reasonable (it often is!) and then explain why it’s wrong. If I can’t see what it’s based on, then I ask something along “what could convince you otherwise?” Sometimes there’s nothing that could dislodge the truck stuck in the mud, and it’s good to know that.
I find that this is a useful approach in everyday personal disagreements too because a lot of them are spawned out of suspicions. If someone shirks on a household chore, maybe it’s because they genuinely forgot OR MAYBE it’s because they are driven by animus and hatred towards their roommates. If the shirking continues as part of a regular pattern, it’s perfectly reasonable for the roommates to become drawn to the latter hypothesis.
To your broader point, accusing someone of bad faith doesn’t really accomplish much, and your proposed solutions (just stick to the object level or, in the alternative and if the circumstances warrant it, full-contact psychoanalysis) seem perfectly appropriate.
Good post, I largely agree with your point. This part in particular is relevant:
I get accused of bad faith regularly (whether the accusation is earnest and made in “good faith” is another question) and I agree completely that a naked denial doesn’t accomplish anything. Like you, I usually can see what the accusation is based on and so what I do is acknowledge that the suspicion is reasonable (it often is!) and then explain why it’s wrong. If I can’t see what it’s based on, then I ask something along “what could convince you otherwise?” Sometimes there’s nothing that could dislodge the truck stuck in the mud, and it’s good to know that.
I find that this is a useful approach in everyday personal disagreements too because a lot of them are spawned out of suspicions. If someone shirks on a household chore, maybe it’s because they genuinely forgot OR MAYBE it’s because they are driven by animus and hatred towards their roommates. If the shirking continues as part of a regular pattern, it’s perfectly reasonable for the roommates to become drawn to the latter hypothesis.
To your broader point, accusing someone of bad faith doesn’t really accomplish much, and your proposed solutions (just stick to the object level or, in the alternative and if the circumstances warrant it, full-contact psychoanalysis) seem perfectly appropriate.