For example, off the top of my head I can’t recall a reading single sneery comment about unattractive women (and I also never observed them getting ignored at meetups,
I’ve seen Roissy recommended as though anyone would be delighted by reading him. He’s a very sneery fellow. On the other hand that was a year or more ago, which is several eternities in internet time.
On the other hand, the perceived friendliness issues are ongoing.
A possibly useful distinction: courtesy vs. cordiality. Courtesy means a moderate level of respect which includes saying “I disagree” rather than “You’re wrong”. Cordiality means giving positive indications of liking.
They blur into each other. I would read “Thank you” as mostly courteous and “Thank you!” as cordial.
I can sympathize with your desire to not offend—I’m like that about race. However, reading is cheaper than making mistakes in public, and can be fairly educational.
I’ve seen Roissy recommended as though anyone would be delighted by reading him. He’s a very sneery fellow. On the other hand that was a year or more ago, which is several eternities in internet time.
On the other hand, the perceived friendliness issues are ongoing.
A possibly useful distinction: courtesy vs. cordiality. Courtesy means a moderate level of respect which includes saying “I disagree” rather than “You’re wrong”. Cordiality means giving positive indications of liking.
They blur into each other. I would read “Thank you” as mostly courteous and “Thank you!” as cordial.
I can sympathize with your desire to not offend—I’m like that about race. However, reading is cheaper than making mistakes in public, and can be fairly educational.