I appreciate the distinction among “Wanting people to thrive”, “Empathy”, and “Love.” These categories are somewhat related to four universal attitudes I practice:
Loving-friendliness. The unconditional well-wishing toward all living beings, myself included. May all be healthy, happy, secure, and peaceful! Sometimes this is accompanied by sensations of warmth radiating from the chest or torso.
Sympathetic joy. A subset of (1), the way it feels to love those who are thriving, meeting with success, or otherwise happy for any reason. Yay! A smile comes easily with this jubilance.
Compassion. A subset of (1), the way it feels to love those who are suffering. Critically, this is not suffering because others are suffering. When you get to the ER, you don’t want the doctor to break down in tears upon seeing your condition. You want a calm and compassionate caregiver. It can be a tender feeling at times.
Equanimity. Peace. The doctors’ calmness that allows them to love and do their best in a world that is ultimately out of anyone’s control. Unshakable acceptance that things keep changing; pleasure and pain come and go. People do or say things we wouldn’t want them to do or say, but that comes as no surprise and there’s nothing to gain by worrying about that timeless fact. This imperturbability sometimes comes with a cool, spacious feeling in the head.
Cool head, warm heart. These are very healthy human qualities to cultivate any time. They lead to good intentions, which in turn lead to good actions.
Thanks for sharing these sweet thoughts.
I appreciate the distinction among “Wanting people to thrive”, “Empathy”, and “Love.” These categories are somewhat related to four universal attitudes I practice:
Loving-friendliness. The unconditional well-wishing toward all living beings, myself included. May all be healthy, happy, secure, and peaceful! Sometimes this is accompanied by sensations of warmth radiating from the chest or torso.
Sympathetic joy. A subset of (1), the way it feels to love those who are thriving, meeting with success, or otherwise happy for any reason. Yay! A smile comes easily with this jubilance.
Compassion. A subset of (1), the way it feels to love those who are suffering. Critically, this is not suffering because others are suffering. When you get to the ER, you don’t want the doctor to break down in tears upon seeing your condition. You want a calm and compassionate caregiver. It can be a tender feeling at times.
Equanimity. Peace. The doctors’ calmness that allows them to love and do their best in a world that is ultimately out of anyone’s control. Unshakable acceptance that things keep changing; pleasure and pain come and go. People do or say things we wouldn’t want them to do or say, but that comes as no surprise and there’s nothing to gain by worrying about that timeless fact. This imperturbability sometimes comes with a cool, spacious feeling in the head.
Cool head, warm heart. These are very healthy human qualities to cultivate any time. They lead to good intentions, which in turn lead to good actions.