I can’t find an appropriate post at the moment, but I’m pretty sure Ferrett Steinmetz writes about him and his wife working to improve each other—a difficult and contentious process, but useful.
Do you think there’s no chance of partners having blind spots in different areas and using this so that eventually both can see more clearly?
Did you mean this post about him and his wife pushing each other into doing things they know the other will like, despite the spouse’s initial protests: I Love My Wife Because She Disrespects Me?
If it works, it’s awesome. I wouldn’t recommend it to an average couple, though. Even an average aspiring rationalist couple should be extra careful.
Constantly showing your partner your weaknesses may be a bad idea. Partners are supposed to impress each other. Of course they know the other one is far from perfect, but that’s not a reason to bring it to attention too frequently. I am not saying it could never work, just that it seems like an unnecessary risk.
And outside of the rationalist community… most people want to believe in mystery. Ruin the mystery, and you may have ruined the relationship.
I can’t find an appropriate post at the moment, but I’m pretty sure Ferrett Steinmetz writes about him and his wife working to improve each other—a difficult and contentious process, but useful.
Do you think there’s no chance of partners having blind spots in different areas and using this so that eventually both can see more clearly?
Did you mean this post about him and his wife pushing each other into doing things they know the other will like, despite the spouse’s initial protests: I Love My Wife Because She Disrespects Me?
Probably at least that one. There may be others.
Thanks.
If it works, it’s awesome. I wouldn’t recommend it to an average couple, though. Even an average aspiring rationalist couple should be extra careful.
Constantly showing your partner your weaknesses may be a bad idea. Partners are supposed to impress each other. Of course they know the other one is far from perfect, but that’s not a reason to bring it to attention too frequently. I am not saying it could never work, just that it seems like an unnecessary risk.
And outside of the rationalist community… most people want to believe in mystery. Ruin the mystery, and you may have ruined the relationship.