Don’t you want your charitable efforts to do the utmost good they can in the world?
I suspect this is going to put people on the back foot. (as in—a defensive position. Making it hard to take in the rest of the article) Especially as its a rhetorical question coming from the negative. Try: ”So you want your charitable efforts to do the most good they can in the world?”
imagine
I know plenty of people for which this word is a turn-off if not used carefully. knowing as well that some people don’t imagine like other people means you need to be quite careful with the placement of the word imagine.
my personal perspective
sounds like it’s purposely weakening the quality of the source. “it’s just me saying this” remove “personal”
really passionate
remove “really”
I have taken the… pledges
there’s an implicit boast in this statement; and an accusation towards the reader as to why they have not done it yet. That’s not a good attitude to be spreading, and probably won’t motivate people.
Thank you, this is really great stuff! I will make improvements in the article in the venue I have control over, Intentional Insights. I will aim to improve my writing more broadly for being more positively oriented, giving more clear sourcing, and being more clearly oriented toward motivating people more effectively. Thanks!
I suspect this is going to put people on the back foot. (as in—a defensive position. Making it hard to take in the rest of the article) Especially as its a rhetorical question coming from the negative.
Try:
”So you want your charitable efforts to do the most good they can in the world?”
I know plenty of people for which this word is a turn-off if not used carefully. knowing as well that some people don’t imagine like other people means you need to be quite careful with the placement of the word imagine.
sounds like it’s purposely weakening the quality of the source. “it’s just me saying this”
remove “personal”
remove “really”
there’s an implicit boast in this statement; and an accusation towards the reader as to why they have not done it yet. That’s not a good attitude to be spreading, and probably won’t motivate people.
keep your identity small … identifying is something we shouldn’t recommend.
Top for what? include the relevant information. Without the information; it’s more fluff than value sharing.
source?
This article could do with a number of improvements...
Thank you, this is really great stuff! I will make improvements in the article in the venue I have control over, Intentional Insights. I will aim to improve my writing more broadly for being more positively oriented, giving more clear sourcing, and being more clearly oriented toward motivating people more effectively. Thanks!