generally girl-game my way into getting what I want. (Charming guys is fun!)
I’m trying to unpack this sentence, I think it means something like this: “I signal sexual availability so that males will offer me favours in exchange, but I have enough plausible deniability so that I don’t have to follow through” plus “whenever a male accepts such an exchange, I get a self-esteem boost”. I don’t know if such an interpretation is generally what other people have in their minds.
my attractiveness to men depends largely on my looks but the inverse is not true
So that’s an opinion between females too? Does that have a chance to be true? I don’t see any particular evidence supporting it...
I’m trying to unpack this sentence, I think it means something like this: “I signal sexual availability so that males will offer me favours in exchange, but I have enough plausible deniability so that I don’t have to follow through” plus “whenever a male accepts such an exchange, I get a self-esteem boost”. I don’t know if such an interpretation is generally what other people have in their minds.
Just a bit of personal experience / observation / commentary:
Your interpretation is the Evo side of the Evo-Cog boundary. The cognition (adaptation-executer) side of it is that when a young appealing-to-the-target woman “girl-games”, it triggers conditions where the targeted man (or men) executes adaptations that survived in human genetics that make him act more friendly and helpful towards the woman, or make him feel valued (which for other reasons explained in a previous post on Dark Arts that I can’t find, incites reciprocation by doing things of value to the other person) and therefore already situated in a different type of social interaction where it appears more advantageous (to the subconscious) to cooperate.
Basically, yes to your interpretation in terms of why the process exists, but that is not at all what is going on in the minds of the participants—the young men genuinely feel nervous and valued and uncertain about the girl flirting or charming them and the motivations behind it or whether indeed there are any at all, and they also in most cases genuinely feel the urge to be helpful or friendly ‘simply because’ the girl was friendly / flirty, and subconsciously there’s all this stuff about getting into closer relationships with people that seem attractive because overall that gives more opportunities later for actually getting into serious romantic relationships or, y’know, getting some good casual sex.
I don’t know if such an interpretation is generally what other people have in their minds.
Well, I am imagining it’s something along the line of “I’ll give you a kiss if you get me a soda from the fridge.”
Guy: You mean I just have to walk over to the fridge and I get a kiss? Score!
Girl: You mean I just have to give out a kiss while sitting and I don’t have to get up and get my soda? Score!
I mean, if my wife said “I girl-game my way into getting what I want (Charming you is fun!)” That’s what I would assume she meant.
Of course, you CAN girl-game your way to a favor with Sex, but I would imagine you usually don’t need to go anywhere near that far for much smaller favors.
That being said, I’m thinking of already being in a relationship. I’m not entirely sure how this would work on a flirting with an unattached person level, since I don’t recall ever receiving much flirting before I was in a relationship.
Guy: You mean I just have to walk over to the fridge and I get a kiss? Score!
Girl: You mean I just have to give out a kiss while sitting and I don’t have to get up and get my soda? Score!
Oh, I had in mind this picture instead: “I’ll give you a kiss if you get me a soda from the fridge.”
Guys fetch the soda, girls walks away with the soda.
That being said, I’m thinking of already being in a relationship. I’m not entirely sure how this would work on a flirting with an unattached person level, since I don’t recall ever receiving much flirting before I was in a relationship.
In my experience, I’ve seen plenty ‘egalitarian’ exchanges between two engaged people, while I’ve never ever seen such an exchange between a girl flirting with a stranger.
I’m trying to unpack this sentence, I think it means something like this: “I signal sexual availability so that males will offer me favours in exchange, but I have enough plausible deniability so that I don’t have to follow through” plus “whenever a male accepts such an exchange, I get a self-esteem boost”. I don’t know if such an interpretation is generally what other people have in their minds.
So that’s an opinion between females too? Does that have a chance to be true? I don’t see any particular evidence supporting it...
Just a bit of personal experience / observation / commentary:
Your interpretation is the Evo side of the Evo-Cog boundary. The cognition (adaptation-executer) side of it is that when a young appealing-to-the-target woman “girl-games”, it triggers conditions where the targeted man (or men) executes adaptations that survived in human genetics that make him act more friendly and helpful towards the woman, or make him feel valued (which for other reasons explained in a previous post on Dark Arts that I can’t find, incites reciprocation by doing things of value to the other person) and therefore already situated in a different type of social interaction where it appears more advantageous (to the subconscious) to cooperate.
Basically, yes to your interpretation in terms of why the process exists, but that is not at all what is going on in the minds of the participants—the young men genuinely feel nervous and valued and uncertain about the girl flirting or charming them and the motivations behind it or whether indeed there are any at all, and they also in most cases genuinely feel the urge to be helpful or friendly ‘simply because’ the girl was friendly / flirty, and subconsciously there’s all this stuff about getting into closer relationships with people that seem attractive because overall that gives more opportunities later for actually getting into serious romantic relationships or, y’know, getting some good casual sex.
Well, I am imagining it’s something along the line of “I’ll give you a kiss if you get me a soda from the fridge.”
Guy: You mean I just have to walk over to the fridge and I get a kiss? Score!
Girl: You mean I just have to give out a kiss while sitting and I don’t have to get up and get my soda? Score!
I mean, if my wife said “I girl-game my way into getting what I want (Charming you is fun!)” That’s what I would assume she meant.
Of course, you CAN girl-game your way to a favor with Sex, but I would imagine you usually don’t need to go anywhere near that far for much smaller favors.
That being said, I’m thinking of already being in a relationship. I’m not entirely sure how this would work on a flirting with an unattached person level, since I don’t recall ever receiving much flirting before I was in a relationship.
Oh, I had in mind this picture instead: “I’ll give you a kiss if you get me a soda from the fridge.” Guys fetch the soda, girls walks away with the soda.
In my experience, I’ve seen plenty ‘egalitarian’ exchanges between two engaged people, while I’ve never ever seen such an exchange between a girl flirting with a stranger.
I wonder which was the intended interpration...
If it is explicit, is it really a “game”? Sounds more like “I sure could use a cold drink right now” smile wink shoulder rub etc.
I interpreted the sentence as saying, “a certain class of Dark Arts are easily available to me, and I use them to get what I want”.