But it’s just hard to understand other girls being offended when I’m not, because it’s much harder to empathise with someone you don’t agree with
I think it’s less of an opinion disagreement and more of an experience disagreement.
For example—in middle school and high school, I experienced extensive racism at least twice a month, sometimes involving physical violence. I was pretty angry about the whole thing, My race was affecting my life negatively, and I thought that society was deeply, deeply fucked up to harbor these beliefs. I got angry whenever people displayed ignorance.
In college, I experience racism directed at me only about twice a year—and none of it is ever violent. My attitude about race in my current situation maps well with your attitude about gender—I don’t think it really affects me negatively, in fact it has a few advantages, and many of the stereotypes actually do apply to me and I won’t fault people for making assumptions. If people display ignorance now, I just take it as part of how they were raised—it’s not any barrier to friendship.
I’ve had both experiences, so I can relate to either situation. If I had only had bad experiences, it would be hard for me to understand how anyone could say that racism wasn’t a big deal. If I had only had good experiences, it would be difficult for me to see what all the fuss was about.
Currently, I live in a place where I see sexism constantly at work. I’ve never experienced a gender-egalitarian environment or social group, and that probably colors my negative attitude towards some aspects of PUA. If someone lives in an environment without being exposed to constant sexism and gender essentialism, PUA probably seems like an insightful, roughly accurate portrayal of gender dynamics. If someone experiences sexism every day, then PUA probably seems like a perpetuation of everything which is wrong with society (since it perpetuates the negative aspects of the gender dynamic).
Whether or not racism and sexism is a problem depends entirely on the time, place, and social group you are in. I think many of these “disagreements” just stem from people having different realities in their daily lives.
I think it’s less of an opinion disagreement and more of an experience disagreement.
For example—in middle school and high school, I experienced extensive racism at least twice a month, sometimes involving physical violence. I was pretty angry about the whole thing, My race was affecting my life negatively, and I thought that society was deeply, deeply fucked up to harbor these beliefs. I got angry whenever people displayed ignorance.
In college, I experience racism directed at me only about twice a year—and none of it is ever violent. My attitude about race in my current situation maps well with your attitude about gender—I don’t think it really affects me negatively, in fact it has a few advantages, and many of the stereotypes actually do apply to me and I won’t fault people for making assumptions. If people display ignorance now, I just take it as part of how they were raised—it’s not any barrier to friendship.
I’ve had both experiences, so I can relate to either situation. If I had only had bad experiences, it would be hard for me to understand how anyone could say that racism wasn’t a big deal. If I had only had good experiences, it would be difficult for me to see what all the fuss was about.
Currently, I live in a place where I see sexism constantly at work. I’ve never experienced a gender-egalitarian environment or social group, and that probably colors my negative attitude towards some aspects of PUA. If someone lives in an environment without being exposed to constant sexism and gender essentialism, PUA probably seems like an insightful, roughly accurate portrayal of gender dynamics. If someone experiences sexism every day, then PUA probably seems like a perpetuation of everything which is wrong with society (since it perpetuates the negative aspects of the gender dynamic).
Whether or not racism and sexism is a problem depends entirely on the time, place, and social group you are in. I think many of these “disagreements” just stem from people having different realities in their daily lives.