I am struggling with the general point, but I think in some situations it is clear that one is in a “bad” state and needs improvement. Here is an example (similar to Chris Argyris’s XY case).
A: “I don’t think I’m being effective. How can I be of more help to X?”
B: “Well, just stop being so negative and pointing out others’ faults. That just doesn’t work and tends to make you look bad.”
Here, B is giving advice on how to act, while at the same time acting contrary to that advice. The values B wants to follow are clearly not the values he is actually following; furthermore, B doesn’t realize that this is happening (or he wouldn’t act that way).
This seems to be a state that is clearly “bad”, and shouldn’t be seen as just different. If I am demonstrably and obliviously acting against my values as I would express them at the time, then I clearly need help. Note that this is different from saying that I am acting against some set of values I would consider good if I were in a different/better state of mind. The values I am unknowingly transgressing are the ones I think I’m currently trying to fulfill.
Does this make sense? What are your reactions?
By the way, this is a common situation; people feeling stress, threat, or embarrassment often start acting in this way.
I don’t think hypocrisy is so fundamentally different as you think. If it interferes with your other goals (e.g. by making you less rational than you need to be) then work on it, but if hypocrisy gives you warm fuzzies (which it seems do for many people) then go ahead, although you shouldn’t be surprised if other people judge you (or don’t trust you) because of it.
I am struggling with the general point, but I think in some situations it is clear that one is in a “bad” state and needs improvement. Here is an example (similar to Chris Argyris’s XY case).
A: “I don’t think I’m being effective. How can I be of more help to X?”
B: “Well, just stop being so negative and pointing out others’ faults. That just doesn’t work and tends to make you look bad.”
Here, B is giving advice on how to act, while at the same time acting contrary to that advice. The values B wants to follow are clearly not the values he is actually following; furthermore, B doesn’t realize that this is happening (or he wouldn’t act that way).
This seems to be a state that is clearly “bad”, and shouldn’t be seen as just different. If I am demonstrably and obliviously acting against my values as I would express them at the time, then I clearly need help. Note that this is different from saying that I am acting against some set of values I would consider good if I were in a different/better state of mind. The values I am unknowingly transgressing are the ones I think I’m currently trying to fulfill.
Does this make sense? What are your reactions?
By the way, this is a common situation; people feeling stress, threat, or embarrassment often start acting in this way.
I don’t think hypocrisy is so fundamentally different as you think. If it interferes with your other goals (e.g. by making you less rational than you need to be) then work on it, but if hypocrisy gives you warm fuzzies (which it seems do for many people) then go ahead, although you shouldn’t be surprised if other people judge you (or don’t trust you) because of it.