Actually, I moved away from them a few years ago for various reasons (not feeling on the same wavelength, wanting there to be more to life than alcohol & drugs...), so I don’t spend that much time with them, although there are a few of them I want to stay in contact with, friends who see me as practically family.
I still refer to them as my peer group, because I haven’t really made a new friendship group that lasted. I haven’t really had a social life for over a year, and its quite tranquil in a way. I was starting to get stuck in cycles of social anxiety and I hope this solitude has broken the cycle and given me time to think objectively. For instance, I’ve realised just how many people were attracted to me, but I was not aware of at the time due to a lack of social/romantic confidence and an inability to pick up on any even remotely subtle hint.
When I next move to a new city, I’m going to meet people who have similar interests—for instance at a boardgames club has worked well in the past. And I’m going to display the same level of social confidence as the intellectual confidence I already have, because vicious cycles can run backwards too.
Thanks for your advice.
Boring personal details:
Actually, I moved away from them a few years ago for various reasons (not feeling on the same wavelength, wanting there to be more to life than alcohol & drugs...), so I don’t spend that much time with them, although there are a few of them I want to stay in contact with, friends who see me as practically family.
I still refer to them as my peer group, because I haven’t really made a new friendship group that lasted. I haven’t really had a social life for over a year, and its quite tranquil in a way. I was starting to get stuck in cycles of social anxiety and I hope this solitude has broken the cycle and given me time to think objectively. For instance, I’ve realised just how many people were attracted to me, but I was not aware of at the time due to a lack of social/romantic confidence and an inability to pick up on any even remotely subtle hint.
When I next move to a new city, I’m going to meet people who have similar interests—for instance at a boardgames club has worked well in the past. And I’m going to display the same level of social confidence as the intellectual confidence I already have, because vicious cycles can run backwards too.