I have started writing a Death Note fanfiction where the characters aren’t all as dumb as a bag of bricks (or one could say a rationalist fic) and… I need betas. The first chapter is available on http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9380249/1/Rationalising-Death and the second is pretty much written, but the first is confirmedly “funky” in writing and since I’m not a native English speaker I’m not sure I can actually pinpoint what exactly is wrong with it. Also I’d love the extra help.
Anyone interested? My email for contact is firstname.lastname@example.org (and I also have a tumblr account, http://scientiststhesis.tumblr.com )
Initial observations: you are cribbing too heavily from MoR, your Light is too much like Harry, the focus on utility seems silly, and jumping straight to crypto reasoning for randomness is completely unmotivated by anything foregoing.
Definitely interested. I’ll send you an email.
I’ll help out if you want. I sent you an email.