I have been in the Light World, then the Dark and I’ve been working on escaping it for years, with partial success. It felt good to read this essay, the fact that the move is doable but takes a ton of work and time resonates with my expérience. It’s a small example, but the example of the child psychopath who recovered thanks to professionnal help gave me hope. I have had to renunce to parts of my integrity, empathy and trust in the world and others in order to deal with difficult situations and build for myself a safe environment. I am working on gaining them back, but woah that’s hard !
Some things which helped me :
Internal Family System and learning to communicate with love to all my parts, including the angry hurt ones, including the irrationnal ones
Going no contact with my mother, who was the main source of emotional violence. Hardest choice of my life, I don’t regret it.
Making new friends who are kind, warm and empathetic—and learn from them. Having old friends I trust a lot helped too.
(not sure I would recommend it to anyone else, but it was necessary for me to change pattern) temporarily stopping to pursue big goals and limitting my responsabilities. Numbing my feelings was the only way I knew to deal with deadlines and responsibilities. Getting rid of external pressures gave me the space needed to learn how to explore and process my feelings in an healthier way. Cons : not always possible + create a disconnect from the world and from a sense of purpose
I have been in the Light World, then the Dark and I’ve been working on escaping it for years, with partial success. It felt good to read this essay, the fact that the move is doable but takes a ton of work and time resonates with my expérience. It’s a small example, but the example of the child psychopath who recovered thanks to professionnal help gave me hope. I have had to renunce to parts of my integrity, empathy and trust in the world and others in order to deal with difficult situations and build for myself a safe environment. I am working on gaining them back, but woah that’s hard !
Some things which helped me :
Internal Family System and learning to communicate with love to all my parts, including the angry hurt ones, including the irrationnal ones
Going no contact with my mother, who was the main source of emotional violence. Hardest choice of my life, I don’t regret it.
Making new friends who are kind, warm and empathetic—and learn from them. Having old friends I trust a lot helped too.
(not sure I would recommend it to anyone else, but it was necessary for me to change pattern) temporarily stopping to pursue big goals and limitting my responsabilities. Numbing my feelings was the only way I knew to deal with deadlines and responsibilities. Getting rid of external pressures gave me the space needed to learn how to explore and process my feelings in an healthier way. Cons : not always possible + create a disconnect from the world and from a sense of purpose