It looks like you’ve got an anxiety flareup every time you try to work. Anxiety is not necessarily presented as fast heartbeat, hyperventilation or any other easily measurable symptom. I have seen it aplenty in myself and others. Often the issue is not enough slack, but the way you describe it, it seems you have plenty, but maybe not the mental kind.
One approach that I have seen to help is to do a “15 min work”. Not a pomodoro, though! Those imply lots of structured work and short breaks. Just… “I will write this code for 15 min” or “I will edit this post for 15 min”, no further obligations, no pressure. If you stop after 15 min, it’s still an accomplishment, if you decide to keep going for a time, that’s fine, too. But stop when you get the same feeling again, and do something more fun. Once the internal pressure goes away, think when you can do another “15 min, no obligations past that” work.
It looks like you’ve got an anxiety flareup every time you try to work. Anxiety is not necessarily presented as fast heartbeat, hyperventilation or any other easily measurable symptom. I have seen it aplenty in myself and others. Often the issue is not enough slack, but the way you describe it, it seems you have plenty, but maybe not the mental kind.
One approach that I have seen to help is to do a “15 min work”. Not a pomodoro, though! Those imply lots of structured work and short breaks. Just… “I will write this code for 15 min” or “I will edit this post for 15 min”, no further obligations, no pressure. If you stop after 15 min, it’s still an accomplishment, if you decide to keep going for a time, that’s fine, too. But stop when you get the same feeling again, and do something more fun. Once the internal pressure goes away, think when you can do another “15 min, no obligations past that” work.