Now, I’ve praised the virtues of wait culture because I think it’s undervalued, but there’s plenty to say for interrupt culture as well. For one, it’s more robust in “unwalled” circumstances. If there’s no one around to enforce wait culture norms, then a few jerks can dominate the discussion, silencing everyone else. But someone who doesn’t follow “interrupt” norms only silences themselves.
I’m not sure this is necessarily true.
I’ve found hat, where “interrupt” norms hold sway, a few jerks can STILL dominate the discussion, by interrupting everyone else and speaking loudly and aggressively enough that no one can successfully interrupt them back. If, when someone interrupts you, you simply keep talking as if they aren’t even there, and you have the right body language and voice projection tricks to make the rest of the audience keep listening to you and ignore the re-interrupter, you’ve won.
Agreed. Just interrupting isn’t enough to be heard in an “interrupt culture”. You have to keep talking (usually loudly) until the other person stops, and they have to be willing to do so, and if your body language is wrong or your charisma is too low or you’re not being enough of a jerk yourself, nobody can hear you and you’ve lost.
Of course, in “wait culture”, the same problem exists, but it often manifests by evolving into “interrupt culture” for those whose body language is wrong or charisma too low.
I.e., the higher your charisma/social power in relation to your conversational partner, the more likely you are to be able to impose “waiting” behavior on them, and the more likely you are to get away with “interrupt” behavior yourself, even in relation to the wider group norms.
And this isn’t necessarily a bad thing—even among those of us who have a largely Wait-based circle of friends, I’m sure we all know “that one guy” with that one particular set of pet subjects/rants, for whom everyone will interrupt and say “not this again, Dave”.
I’m not sure this is necessarily true.
I’ve found hat, where “interrupt” norms hold sway, a few jerks can STILL dominate the discussion, by interrupting everyone else and speaking loudly and aggressively enough that no one can successfully interrupt them back. If, when someone interrupts you, you simply keep talking as if they aren’t even there, and you have the right body language and voice projection tricks to make the rest of the audience keep listening to you and ignore the re-interrupter, you’ve won.
Agreed. Just interrupting isn’t enough to be heard in an “interrupt culture”. You have to keep talking (usually loudly) until the other person stops, and they have to be willing to do so, and if your body language is wrong or your charisma is too low or you’re not being enough of a jerk yourself, nobody can hear you and you’ve lost.
Of course, in “wait culture”, the same problem exists, but it often manifests by evolving into “interrupt culture” for those whose body language is wrong or charisma too low.
I.e., the higher your charisma/social power in relation to your conversational partner, the more likely you are to be able to impose “waiting” behavior on them, and the more likely you are to get away with “interrupt” behavior yourself, even in relation to the wider group norms.
And this isn’t necessarily a bad thing—even among those of us who have a largely Wait-based circle of friends, I’m sure we all know “that one guy” with that one particular set of pet subjects/rants, for whom everyone will interrupt and say “not this again, Dave”.