Can you give some nonextreme examples what those attitudes, expectations and consequences would be? There will also be consequences to you if you treat all liars equally harshly, and people would benefit from taking this seriously unless honesty is some kind of a first priority terminal value for them.
One of the points here is that, as usual, it depends. Let’s say someone I know lied to me and I found out that it was a lie. My response would depend on three major factors:
The kind of relationship with that person. Relationships have (mostly implicit) rules and promises. A lie may or may not break such a promise. A co-worker lying to you about where he was last weekend is different from your partner lying to you about where he was last weekend.
The motivation behind the lie. A lie to avoid embarrassment is different from a lie to gain some advantage over you.
The nature of the lie—its magnitude and character. A lie to make oneself look better is different from a lie which results in you being fired from your job.
I don’t want to treat liars equally harshly or equally leniently. I want to treat them depending on the circumstances. There is no “general case”.
A non-extreme example of attitudes, expectations, and consequences? Sure. Let’s say Alice is a drama queen and wants lots of attention. She tend to lie (in minor ways) about what actually happened and also (in more pronounced ways) about her feelings and reactions. If I learn this about Alice I would adjust my opinion about what kind of a person she is, I would expect her accounts of herself to be exaggerated, and I would treat her troubles and problems less seriously.
Can you give some nonextreme examples what those attitudes, expectations and consequences would be? There will also be consequences to you if you treat all liars equally harshly, and people would benefit from taking this seriously unless honesty is some kind of a first priority terminal value for them.
One of the points here is that, as usual, it depends. Let’s say someone I know lied to me and I found out that it was a lie. My response would depend on three major factors:
The kind of relationship with that person. Relationships have (mostly implicit) rules and promises. A lie may or may not break such a promise. A co-worker lying to you about where he was last weekend is different from your partner lying to you about where he was last weekend.
The motivation behind the lie. A lie to avoid embarrassment is different from a lie to gain some advantage over you.
The nature of the lie—its magnitude and character. A lie to make oneself look better is different from a lie which results in you being fired from your job.
I don’t want to treat liars equally harshly or equally leniently. I want to treat them depending on the circumstances. There is no “general case”.
A non-extreme example of attitudes, expectations, and consequences? Sure. Let’s say Alice is a drama queen and wants lots of attention. She tend to lie (in minor ways) about what actually happened and also (in more pronounced ways) about her feelings and reactions. If I learn this about Alice I would adjust my opinion about what kind of a person she is, I would expect her accounts of herself to be exaggerated, and I would treat her troubles and problems less seriously.
That’s a nice summary of the kind of flexibility I would endorse, thanks.