excessive use of physical affection (kisses, hugs, sex) as a “reward” for good behavior changes the experience of those activities—and not in a good way.
Could you elaborate on that? I’m entirely okay with physical affection being used as a “reward”, as long as it’s also clear that the person genuinely wants affection with me, and initiates it “just because” too (actually I’d probably be entirely okay with a strictly reward-based system of affection, as long as it was explicit...)
I have no trouble detecting when rewards are being used as “approximations” towards a behavioral landscape that I clearly don’t want
You seem to be assuming, in the example, that the husband doesn’t WANT to be modified to put away his laundry. Is that correct?
If so, is it correct that your objection is “you’re manipulating me in to a state I don’t desire” rather than simply “you’re manipulating me”? Given that you PERSONALLY find soiled clothes disgusting, would you PERSONALLY appreciate reinforcement that helped you overcome such a habit?
You seem to be assuming, in the example, that the husband doesn’t WANT to be modified to put away his laundry. Is that correct?
Yes.
If so, is it correct that your objection is “you’re manipulating me in to a state I don’t desire” rather than simply “you’re manipulating me”? Given that you PERSONALLY find soiled clothes disgusting, would you PERSONALLY appreciate reinforcement that helped you overcome such a habit?
Could you elaborate on that? I’m entirely okay with physical affection being used as a “reward”, as long as it’s also clear that the person genuinely wants affection with me, and initiates it “just because” too (actually I’d probably be entirely okay with a strictly reward-based system of affection, as long as it was explicit...)
You seem to be assuming, in the example, that the husband doesn’t WANT to be modified to put away his laundry. Is that correct?
If so, is it correct that your objection is “you’re manipulating me in to a state I don’t desire” rather than simply “you’re manipulating me”? Given that you PERSONALLY find soiled clothes disgusting, would you PERSONALLY appreciate reinforcement that helped you overcome such a habit?
Yes.
Yes.