But if my nonfungible traits are her cup of tea, fungible traits don’t seem to do much of anything!
In other words, fungible traits are the fallback when a girl doesn’t like you very much. They’re literally only worth considering if you assume she doesn’t like you as a premise.
This seems very contrary to my experience and that of other women I know (and makes little sense in the abstract. Your “fungible” and “non-fungible” traits literally funge against one another in people’s assessments; why wouldn’t they?
E.g. I’m a married woman. My husband is my favorite person; I love his “nonfungible traits”; his creativity, his humor, his abiding commitment to making the world better, his refusal to give into motivated cognition, his unerring integrity.
If he were one standard deviation less attractive, I’d probably never feel physically attracted to him, having sex with him would disgust me, and he’d be one of a bunch of nerds I feel vaguely guilty I’d never consider dating because they’re obviously great people.
Of course most women care about money and comfort and attractiveness (which affect your life in many ways other than social status!) while they also care about good character and humor and EQ… doesn’t almost everyone? When you assess a job, doesn’t comp and location trade off somewhat against the company culture and how much you expect to like the work?
This seems very contrary to my experience and that of other women I know (and makes little sense in the abstract. Your “fungible” and “non-fungible” traits literally funge against one another in people’s assessments; why wouldn’t they?
E.g. I’m a married woman. My husband is my favorite person; I love his “nonfungible traits”; his creativity, his humor, his abiding commitment to making the world better, his refusal to give into motivated cognition, his unerring integrity.
If he were one standard deviation less attractive, I’d probably never feel physically attracted to him, having sex with him would disgust me, and he’d be one of a bunch of nerds I feel vaguely guilty I’d never consider dating because they’re obviously great people.
Of course most women care about money and comfort and attractiveness (which affect your life in many ways other than social status!) while they also care about good character and humor and EQ… doesn’t almost everyone? When you assess a job, doesn’t comp and location trade off somewhat against the company culture and how much you expect to like the work?