It’s still System-1-weird to me (I understand it on System 2 level) how most people on dating apps assign overwhelming importance to photos. For me, the algorithm is:
Read profile
If it is good (it rarely is), look at photo (otherwise swipe left)
If the photo is not terrible, swipe right
Also, I relate to Goblin about the dissonance between “shy nerdy guys” complaining they don’t get dates, and them being apparently completely uninterested in me (or maybe it’s a total breakdown of communication[1]). Although I can also understand why I fail to meet their requirements.
As some evidence for this hypothesis, my spouse (who is nonbinary but otherwise fits the profile), said that if I met them in real life instead of (the old) OkCupid, they would not initiate because they’d assume I’m out of their league. (Also, yes, I’m married but still griping about dating apps, because poly and insatiable.)
It’s still System-1-weird to me (I understand it on System 2 level) how most people on dating apps assign overwhelming importance to photos. For me, the algorithm is:
Read profile
If it is good (it rarely is), look at photo (otherwise swipe left)
If the photo is not terrible, swipe right
Also, I relate to Goblin about the dissonance between “shy nerdy guys” complaining they don’t get dates, and them being apparently completely uninterested in me (or maybe it’s a total breakdown of communication[1]). Although I can also understand why I fail to meet their requirements.
As some evidence for this hypothesis, my spouse (who is nonbinary but otherwise fits the profile), said that if I met them in real life instead of (the old) OkCupid, they would not initiate because they’d assume I’m out of their league. (Also, yes, I’m married but still griping about dating apps, because poly and insatiable.)