I found it helped to expand my definition of virtue. I learned that I am the best and perhaps only person willing to take care of myself in a way ensuring my long-term capability to do good. This is different than being the only person willing to take care of myself in the way I want, or I think is best. This allows me to defer to my own sense of what’s best for me over other’s advice, but because I’m only sovereign over myself, and not necessarily the best decision-maker in all instances, I find it easier to defer to advice from others than I used to when it makes more sense than anything I can think of to improve my own lot in life. This attitude expands beyond the self concentrically. For example, the people best-suited to ensuring the long-term well-being of a community are the people living in that community; in a country, the people of that country; and during a period of time, the people living during that period of time.
Realizing other people aren’t best-suited to care for you even if they want to, perhaps more than you, makes it imperative to learn how to take care of oneself. In this case, selfish indulgence and virtue are inverted.
For instance, just now I went and listened to a choir singing. You might also admire kittens, or play video games, or curl up in a ball, or watch a movie, or try to figure out whether the actress in the movie was the same one that you saw in a different movie. I’ll call this ‘indulgence’, though it is not quite the right category.
Admiring kittens, playing video games, or watching movies in moderation switches from “I should be doing good, but I’m going to indulge myself” to “I’m running out of spoons to do good today, and while I could run on willpower, and my peers would be eager to see me keep burning the candle at both ends, they don’t internally I need to recharge my batteries to avoid burnout”. “Indulgence” in moderation becomes reframed as responsible self-care.
I found it helped to expand my definition of virtue. I learned that I am the best and perhaps only person willing to take care of myself in a way ensuring my long-term capability to do good. This is different than being the only person willing to take care of myself in the way I want, or I think is best. This allows me to defer to my own sense of what’s best for me over other’s advice, but because I’m only sovereign over myself, and not necessarily the best decision-maker in all instances, I find it easier to defer to advice from others than I used to when it makes more sense than anything I can think of to improve my own lot in life. This attitude expands beyond the self concentrically. For example, the people best-suited to ensuring the long-term well-being of a community are the people living in that community; in a country, the people of that country; and during a period of time, the people living during that period of time.
Realizing other people aren’t best-suited to care for you even if they want to, perhaps more than you, makes it imperative to learn how to take care of oneself. In this case, selfish indulgence and virtue are inverted.
Admiring kittens, playing video games, or watching movies in moderation switches from “I should be doing good, but I’m going to indulge myself” to “I’m running out of spoons to do good today, and while I could run on willpower, and my peers would be eager to see me keep burning the candle at both ends, they don’t internally I need to recharge my batteries to avoid burnout”. “Indulgence” in moderation becomes reframed as responsible self-care.