Thanks. I fixed many of the listed mistakes this spring. Some of that sudden improvement sprang from reading your glowfic early this year, so thank you for that as well. This was the passage where I realized how much low-hanging fruit was piled up in my own mental workspace, this was the passage where I started taking serious notes (early, minor Mad Investor Chaos spoilers):
His thoughts don’t move in the frequent circles and loops that any telepath would be familiar with, of mostly going over the same points and occasionally diverting from them in a new direction. Any time Keltham thinks the same thought twice, or at most three times, he undergoes a reflexive wordless motion and focuses there and starts thinking words about why the thoughts are not-quiescent after having already been spoken.
I know we’re not supposed to optimize for not sounding like a cult, bur holy crap the cult vibe is strong with this remark.
(And yes, I understand that “dignity” is meant to be a shorthand for “behaving in a way that improves humanity’s long term chances of survival”. It’s still a sentence that implies unhealthy social dynamics, even with that framing.)
That does sound like you might’ve made some progress in the Way, at least; well done on having acquired that much more dignity.
Thanks. I fixed many of the listed mistakes this spring. Some of that sudden improvement sprang from reading your glowfic early this year, so thank you for that as well. This was the passage where I realized how much low-hanging fruit was piled up in my own mental workspace, this was the passage where I started taking serious notes (early, minor Mad Investor Chaos spoilers):
His thoughts don’t move in the frequent circles and loops that any telepath would be familiar with, of mostly going over the same points and occasionally diverting from them in a new direction. Any time Keltham thinks the same thought twice, or at most three times, he undergoes a reflexive wordless motion and focuses there and starts thinking words about why the thoughts are not-quiescent after having already been spoken.
That passage has stuck with me too.
I know we’re not supposed to optimize for not sounding like a cult, bur holy crap the cult vibe is strong with this remark.
(And yes, I understand that “dignity” is meant to be a shorthand for “behaving in a way that improves humanity’s long term chances of survival”. It’s still a sentence that implies unhealthy social dynamics, even with that framing.)