Pick something off your list. Preferably something that prevents or corrects the problem of social isolation. Is fun. And you get paid for it. Do it. It only has to be ‘good enough’. Perfect may last a lifetime, but until you KNOW what perfect looks like, pick ‘good enough’.
You are responsible for yourself, and sometimes you can buy some fun. Or at least a better quality of hummus.
ETA: Because it sounds like you are suffering from limited access to satisfaction. You can work on the access. Or you can work on the attitude. And you can work on both.
Pick something off your list. Preferably something that prevents or corrects the problem of social isolation. Is fun. And you get paid for it. Do it. It only has to be ‘good enough’. Perfect may last a lifetime, but until you KNOW what perfect looks like, pick ‘good enough’.
You are responsible for yourself, and sometimes you can buy some fun. Or at least a better quality of hummus.
ETA: Because it sounds like you are suffering from limited access to satisfaction. You can work on the access. Or you can work on the attitude. And you can work on both.