Nice, this is a really nice framework for a useful pattern that I’ve found myself using.
So, this seems to be based heavily off of Focussing—and one of the central tenets of Focussing, is to allow a feeling to express itself in its own terms, before trying to box it into a specific narrative. Personally, I’ve found this to be very helpful, and also, the hardest aspect of Focussing.
When a negative emotion comes up, it’s incredibly hard to avoid instincts to declare “this emotion is wrong, I’m going to avoid it” or “this emotion is right, I’m going to dwell on it”.
This seems to have a little conflict with HEAL—which imposes a non-trivial degree of prescribed, and rigid narrative. Particularly in the Linking step;
A narrative like “The positive experience should be kept in the foreground, and the negative experience should be held in the background” is often true—but I think, trying to rush a feeling into that particular narrative, before you’ve really addressed it on its own terms, can be risky.
i.e; leading to repression, or just not being able to address nuanced drivers behind where that feeling is coming from.
I think, because of this, I’d avoid using HEAL on topics that I feel I haven’t fully untangled my feelings on yet. Or at least, to be very sure to double-check any feelings of dissonance or discomfort that I have during the process.
I’m interested in whether this concern seems legitimate? You seem to have used it more, and more consciously, than I have—so I’d love to have some perspective on it.
This is a great point, and very nicely made—but I do think it avoids the topic of why people end up in these styles of argument in the first place.
I think there would be more value in discussing How to deal with Mob & Bailey situations once they arise rather than How to stop Mob & Bailey situations from arising.
You point out, correctly, that Mob & Bailey situations tend to occur when one is overly anthropomorphising a group of people, as though that group were an individual person.
The real problem is, that there are situations where it really is useful to act that way for pragmatic reasons.
At least in my experience, Mob & Bailey arguments tend to happen in fairly broad discussions about group behaviours—perhaps about ideologies, or social practices between groups.
These are situations where it is very useful and important to be able to try and address an entire group’s collective behaviour, moreso than addressing how individuals act and rationalise their decisions.
In these cases, what we’re really trying to discuss is the mechanics of how groups are organised, rather than any one individual’s beliefs.
If we’re arguing with a Tautology Club which breaks university rules, then talking with the club president does make sense. If we’re arguing with a military, then talking with the Secretary of Defense isn’t a bad place to start—but perhaps investigating middle-management positions would be more practical.
I’d love to read further ideas more along the lines of “How to deal with Mob & Bailey situations”, because I think the results can be quite different depending on which structure of social group you’re arguing with.