Nit: I found myself not knowing what various words in the post mean (marionette, chicanery) and not being super comfortable with others (surreptitiously). I strongly suspect that a non-trivial proportion of other readers are in the same boat and that using simpler words would be an improvement (see Write Simply by Paul Graham).
I know all of those words. I’m not super-comfortable with “chicanery”, but it didn’t cause any issues with my reading. Please click [agree] on my comment if you know all three words and [disagree] if there is at least one you don’t know.
I appreciate the feedback but it’s a tension with no obvious answer. Writing simply is a much higher priority for my argumentative writing, where clarity takes precedence. Simplicity takes a backseat for my story-telling prose because the aim is painting an aesthetic collage with my words as much as it is conveying information. There are small poetic touches that I treasure and I would think others would also appreciate. I could have used puppet instead of marionette, but it makes me picture something out of Sesame Street where the puppeteer is below the puppet, in contrast with a puppeteer hovering above a marionette. The word was also a nod to Pinocchio, everyone’s favorite fictional liar. Similar with chicanery, which in the original 17th century French meant “quibbling on minor points of law brought up to complicate a judicial case”. I didn’t actually know this at the time but the word had the right “cloak and dagger” type of vibe I was looking for.
And I also have to admit there is definitely a self-serving dimension as well. English is my third language and one I didn’t fully learn until I moved to the US at the age of 10, so I get a kick from showing off my vocabulary.
Very good point. I mistakenly assumed that the only goal is to communicate one’s ideas, but in retrospect it is obvious that things like—I’m not sure how to describe this. Aesthetics? Artfulness? How well it flows? -- matter as well, and that such things are a big part of what you were going for in this post. Therefore I take back what I said and think it makes a lot of sense to use colorful, non-simple words.
I’m glad I learned this. I’m going to keep it in mind when I read things and hopefully incorporate it into my own writing as well.
Nit: I found myself not knowing what various words in the post mean (marionette, chicanery) and not being super comfortable with others (surreptitiously). I strongly suspect that a non-trivial proportion of other readers are in the same boat and that using simpler words would be an improvement (see Write Simply by Paul Graham).
I know all of those words. I’m not super-comfortable with “chicanery”, but it didn’t cause any issues with my reading. Please click [agree] on my comment if you know all three words and [disagree] if there is at least one you don’t know.
I appreciate the feedback but it’s a tension with no obvious answer. Writing simply is a much higher priority for my argumentative writing, where clarity takes precedence. Simplicity takes a backseat for my story-telling prose because the aim is painting an aesthetic collage with my words as much as it is conveying information. There are small poetic touches that I treasure and I would think others would also appreciate. I could have used puppet instead of marionette, but it makes me picture something out of Sesame Street where the puppeteer is below the puppet, in contrast with a puppeteer hovering above a marionette. The word was also a nod to Pinocchio, everyone’s favorite fictional liar. Similar with chicanery, which in the original 17th century French meant “quibbling on minor points of law brought up to complicate a judicial case”. I didn’t actually know this at the time but the word had the right “cloak and dagger” type of vibe I was looking for.
And I also have to admit there is definitely a self-serving dimension as well. English is my third language and one I didn’t fully learn until I moved to the US at the age of 10, so I get a kick from showing off my vocabulary.
Very good point. I mistakenly assumed that the only goal is to communicate one’s ideas, but in retrospect it is obvious that things like—I’m not sure how to describe this. Aesthetics? Artfulness? How well it flows? -- matter as well, and that such things are a big part of what you were going for in this post. Therefore I take back what I said and think it makes a lot of sense to use colorful, non-simple words.
I’m glad I learned this. I’m going to keep it in mind when I read things and hopefully incorporate it into my own writing as well.
For balanced feedback, I enjoyed the choice of diction, and particularly those two words.
Trivia: in racetracks, a “chicane” is a random “unnecessary” kink or twist inserted to make it more complicated (and more challenging/fun).
L A Y E R S of happy little accidents