The unconscious thought makes sense, and if I really HAD become that kind of super-effective person, then I would necessarily go about doing the things I imagined that kind of person to do. But the problem was that I didn’t really have many goals besides being this kind of person; I unconsciously thought that if I could just become like that, this new and improved me would discover and handle these things “on his own”.
But there was no second optimization process there that would go do these things; I’m the person who has to be actually motivated to go do them. In the few moments in which I was feeling really driven (often after watching a movie or playing a game), there wasn’t much more that I was motivated to do. I was already in the state of being this really focused person, and studying programming wasn’t going to move me farther towards that goal.
This is the heart of this essay, and it is a fantastic point. I am still confused how everything else you’ve written was necessary to reach this assertion.
This is the heart of this essay, and it is a fantastic point. I am still confused how everything else you’ve written was necessary to reach this assertion.