One thing that seems to help a fair bit is receiving an explanation. Or, similarly, a negative/constructive reaction. I strongly suspect this to be the case for others as well.
I’m not sure why this is though. How much information does the explanation provide? I could usually guess at the reason pretty accurately, I think, so hearing the explanation doesn’t actually cause me to update my beliefs much.
When I get a negative reaction from people (in general, not just downvotes on posts), I start thinking of every possible thing that could have caused it. Knowing which thing caused the bad reaction out of the infinite space of things I could have done is helpful for me because it shuts down the “generate more reasons I might be bad” loop.
When I get a negative reaction from people (in general, not just downvotes on posts), I start thinking of every possible thing that could have caused it. Knowing which thing caused the bad reaction out of the infinite space of things I could have done is helpful for me because it shuts down the “generate more reasons I might be bad” loop.
Ah yes! That’s really helpful. I just realized that that’s a big part of what’s happening with me as well. Thanks!